you're gonna be the death of me, moskowitz

[[ seventeen ]]

for the rest of the night we watched vampire diaries, arguing about relationships and characters, cuddling, making out, arguing some more, throwing things at each other, just your normal couple activities which... i guess we could be soon if we kept this up, and i had a blast.

it was a lot later now and i was wrapped up in hawk's arms as we were watching the beginning of season 4. i had heard my phone buzzing a couple of times, but i ignored it. eventually, the texts and calls starting coming from both of our phones now and seemed to be happening more often, so i finally picked it up and to my surprise there were texts from tons of people that had attended the party, freaking out.

sam was talking about how she had done something really stupid.

miguel thought tory was gonna hate him.

tory was screaming about something that i didn't exactly understand, but it had to do with sam.

demetri was talking about how he got drunk and made a stupid mistake that he thought might make hawk kill him.

aisha was talking about how i missed the party of the year and the cops showed up.

i saw a few more messages, but didn't respond to any of them and just looked at hawk concerned. hawk had opened a video that mitch sent to him and it was of demetri roasting him in front of everyone at the party.

"oh he's DEAD," hawk shouted and every sweet part of him disappeared immediately and it scared me a little.

"hey... you saw how drunk he was i'm- i'm sure he didn't mean it, just calm down."

he turned to me with nothing, but hate in his eyes and it caused me to back up a little bit. any ounce of eli that was in him earlier was completely gone and i didn't know what he was capable of now.

"i um- i think you should go." i saw his face soften a little, realizing that i was afraid, but it was already too late.

"davina i-"

"no hawk, i really think you should go... please go," i said looking down.

"i'm sorry davina. i'll see you tomorrow," he said and then he walked out of my room.

in order to get him off of my mind i decided to text tory and figure out what the hell i missed at the party. she responded quickly and asked if i could facetime so i called her and she explained everything that went down.

"are you sure she kissed him?"

"i saw it with my own two eyes, vina, that little tramp had her hands all over miguel and he had to push her away to get her to stop."

"well i mean at least it doesn't seem like miguel had anything to do with it."

"that doesn't mean i can just let that girl go off thinking it's ok to kiss someone that isn't her boyfriend. she's trying to take what's not hers and i need to teach her a lesson."

"please don't do anything stupid tory, she's not worth it, it was probably a mistake."

"oh it was no mistake. she knew exactly what she was doing."

"alright tory i have to go, but promise you won't go and make things worse."

"i can't do that v, i'll see you tomorrow," she said and then abruptly hung up.

i debated texting her once more to try and convince her to stay out of it, but i just shut off my phone and stared at the ground. nothing seemed to ever go right since i moved here and it was starting to really get to me. i just slept with the boy i had hated for months even though he still acted like a jackass half the time.

i sighed and got ready for bed, picking out a cute outfit for tomorrow and then heading to my bathroom. while i was brushing my teeth i noticed that my neck was covered in hickeys. "just perfect," i mumbled to myself. i didn't have enough makeup to cover them up so i switched the t-shirt i had chosen for tomorrow out with a hoodie, hoping to hide them.

i crawled into my bed and pulled the covers up so high i was practically buried underneath of them. hawk had made me feel so safe and wanted today, but then just as i predicted he went back to his old ways of picking fights and being over dramatic about things that really weren't worth his time and he was dragging me down with him. i knew i should stay away from him, but i just couldn't. the way his shaggy hair flops in the wind when he leaves it down, the feeling i get in my chest when his piercing blue eyes are staring directly into mine, the thought of his warm hands tracing my body, the way he tries to hide his smile when he's trying to act tough and how-.

no! snap out of it! i thought to myself. if he really wanted to prove to me he could be my boyfriend he'd have to show me he was ready. i closed my eyes with hopes that tomorrow would bring a better day and before i knew it i was asleep.