Reasons that spider monkeys suck
1 they literally eat shit
2 they are ugly
3 they are long
4 they have no thumbs
5 they stink
6 they poop everywhere
7 spider
3 they are smarter than me
8 they are terrifying
9 they are too light for how big they are
10 they are very snapable
11 they piss the bed
12 they look like beaten up furry children
13 they are threatening
14 they could rip my face off
15 they are too much like humans...
16 they are our ancestors meaning they are the reason I am here and I don't like that
17 I just fucking hate them
18 they are so full of themselves and I hate it
19 they look like just bones and skin
20 they have weird fingers
21 they could snap my neck if they want
22 how are they so big but so light
23 they look like dementors
24 they will suck the soul out of me
25 they genuinely enjoy playing in their own shit
26 they have wire looking hair
27 they look like my dad as a monkey
28 they are gonna take my girlfriend away from me
29 my girlfriend loves them more than me i can tell
30 they are punt able
31 i wanna use them as a base ball bat
