Bash & Hazel

Sebastian- 2014

I hold Hazel until she falls asleep, and then I hold her some more.

Declan. Fucking Declan.

What a douchebag. He better hopes that he doesn't see me again for a while and God forbid it happens when I'm drunk because I won't be able to resist the urge to punch him in his smug Irish face. I've been resisting for almost three years and I no longer have a reason to.

Hazel. Sad, heartbroken over Declan, Hazel.

Truth be told I didn't think she liked him all that much, but I can't be sure because we didn't talk about her and Declan very often. I think she knew that I didn't want to, and I never asked. But I observed. I saw them together at parties, I watched if he was attentive to her when we went out to bars and restaurants. I noticed how he spoke to her. Whenever he made fun of her for being clumsy, was that in a, 'I love you but I'm teasing' you way, or a cruel way masquerading as a joke? I was never sure. I blame the accent.

Once my arm is fully asleep, I slowly and carefully slide out from under Hazel's body. She'll feel better when she wakes up. Well, her hangover will probably feel better, the rest, probably not.

I tiptoe out of her bedroom and close the door. I don't want her to be alone when she wakes up. I lay down on the couch and look at my phone, I don't want to turn the TV on and risk waking her.

I'm so mad at Declan I can't concentrate. Even though Hazel hasn't told me herself, Carly filled me in on what happened. Good riddance as far as I'm concerned. I hope that clueless girl realizes quickly what a bag of shit she's picked. I hope she doesn't spend as much time as Hazel did.

That's the part that kills me. When Carly called this morning to make sure Hazel was okay she said, "you know? I don't think it's Declan per say she's most upset about. She wouldn't stop talking about turning thirty and being alone or the fact that now she's further away from getting married. I think it was more about those two things than Declan himself."

I see Hazel's planner peeking out from the top of her bag and after a year of thinking about it, I finally know what I'm going to get Hazel for her thirtieth birthday.