Conversations - TMPB series

Chapter 6

XiaoBai, I hope you wont have to read this but if you did then Fate was once again cruel to me.     I know it's selfish of me but I wanted to be the first person you see when you finally opened your eyes. But in case you are finally awakened then I hope in the least this letter eases your heart. 

There have been many misunderstandings and secrets between us XiaoBai and believe me when I say I did what I did to protect you. If I had to do it again, I would probably make the same decisions, except might have understood your insecurity in our relationship better.

I was made aware by the many protective members of your family on how much pain I caused you. History behind us is filled with such thorns which ,even being me I am not able to be rid of them. They wrap around, filling the void with sharp edges of truth that wasn't said and tears that were shed. 

XiaoBai, I would like to clear all your doubts and worry when we finally meet , but with this letter I send my confessions. I love you XiaoBai. Even when you were a little fox, I treated you differently. Milaou told me that hidden inside my heart was a sea of Fuling flowers and nestled in them is you. You have done the unthinkable; to move this cold heart to not only love you but enough to create our son. 

Bai GunGun is the me I wished to be, the child I longed to be and the person you raised. I missed the first many stages in his life but I pledge you my vow that I shall never miss any more with him, you and the future we have.

It's not within me to express the matters of my heart, for until you moved it and set it beating I dindt know it had a voice. The half with you will always keep your protected. Wait for me to see you soon and till then take care and rest well.

Yours and always 

Donghua.

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Bai Feng Jiu folded the letter, now well-worn in the edges and creases. The tears were always there, every time she read and re-read this letter. But they were happy tears, she smiled looking around her fox cave fondly.

It did come as a shock to find herself at her home when she finally woke from her 268 days of sleep( count courtesy GunGun) and to make matters worse the one person she wished to see wasn't near her. She had tried desperately to move but realized her fairy cultivation was severely drained. 

She needn't have to wait that long , soon her family, Zhe Yan, Migu and the everyone else barged in with tears and exclamations of their own. They fussed properly and it wrenched her heart with guilt that she made them worry[ She even noticed her father discreetly wipe his eyes]

They assured her that Dijun was fine and was under sleep cultivation for he too suffered great damage from Milaou. Nevertheless she longed for him.

The three weeks she was awake did fly by quickly and she can almost walk more than just a few steps now. Her bedding was moved closer to the Eastern spring river, and Zhe Yan had added all sorts of healing herbs in the swirling warm water to aid her limbs and movement. Given how much damage she took; its a miracle to be this well and getting better quickly.

GunGun made sure she took all her medicines and applied balms wherever needed. He was his father's boy always fussing about her; adjusting bedding, bringing snacks and herbal tea, reading stories for her to sleep. It warmed her to see him get along well with her family and she teared up so much hearing his bonding with Dijun that GunGun forbade any more stories about it. 

She was delighted to know that her family now knew the full truth and are no longer angry at Dijun. Her father admitted that Dijun came to see him personally before his seclusion to both provide answers and instructions to conduct another wedding. He grumbled that once Dijun was assured that he was no longer accountable, he immediately set about issuing orders to prepare for a lavish wedding.

Feng Jiu smirked, "It was just like him" but had noticed that happiness in her father's voice. Another woman would have blanched at having another wedding with the same man especially after the fiasco that occurred before but not her. She is Bai Feng Jiu and this is the wedding she wanted and wedding she will have. Determined she gave her own instructions to proceed that made her father grumble even more. 

She sighed breaking out of her reverie. All is well now. She reasoned that all they went through was just how it needed to be be make sure their love grew. She decided that there will be no more misunderstandings and secrets and vowed to make it right by Dijun.

She missed him, ached for him. She didnt know how long the seclusion was; Zhe Yan assured her that it wont be too long this time as Dijun wanted return quickly. They also need to prepare more such seclusions till Dijun completely restores his cultivation and also grows his heart [ which was such a relief for her to hear]. 

Rising she took cautious steps towards the center table. She poured herself a cup of tea and smiled hearing the excited voices of her son and her fourth uncle playing. The laughter carried all the way into the den and deciding she might as well join in on the fun she slowly began to walk towards them. No soon than taking three steps she got dizzy.

"Aish, I shouldn't have gotten up so fast". She waved her hands to grab something to steady her but only met air. Clenching her teeth she braced herself for the impact, and as she was about to collapse, strong arms reached out of nowhere. One hand held her waist steading her, the other moved to her neck. A pair of purple eyes met her own amber ones. Sandalwood fragrance filled the air. Bai Feng Jiu blinked before registering the face mere inches from her own.

"Donghua..." raising a shaking hand she cradled his cheek and was delighted to feel his warmth.

"XiaoBai, You are awake" said Dijun steading her and moved his hand to  her face, "Thank you for waking up".  She returned the smile, happy tears running freely and raised her lips to meet his eager ones. "Welcome home"