The rewakening

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Last day of work. They bought him a cake. Perfectly synthetized piece of garbage with a cherry on top. Westmore smiled, nodded and suffered through it. A celebration for being laid off, the irony. Life was so cruel in this world. Still packed away some spare parts, two boxes worth. Not many personal items. Some photo screens and random clothes from his locker, a snow globe. The latter a present from Audrey. The sum total of Nathan Westmore's identity. Nobody said a thing about the boxes. Felt a little comical walking out with those. Silly and spiteful. But he needed it now.

Westmore indulged in a couple more days of gaming. Gathering courage. Deleted several video messages from his mother. None from Audrey, not even a "Hey hope you're okay". Not that any were expected. Blake sent him a mail with motivational videos, hypocrite. Mother tried to call a couple times in the past week, let it ring to end. Tempted to block her. Didn't in the end, not a way to treat his mother.

Condo was cluttered with boxes at this point. Had to spend an afternoon taking inventory. Was slightly shocking no one called him out for taking so much tech, even if it was outdated. Had to take it box by box to where it was needed. Was a thirty minute trip by tube. Always uneventful going to the less populated part of the city.

It was a darker place in this world. Or at least, less bright or busy. Last year Westmore randomly discovered this abandoned complex of buildings. Out on one of his rare walks. Would take the tube to a random destination and pick a direction. The buildings were empty, set for destruction. Yet for some reason more than two years passed since the scheduled demolition, it never came. Must have fallen through some bureaucratic crack. Dusty as hell but still had water and power.

This is where Westmore tinkered with his favorite hobby. Might be only a technician, but didn't mean he wasn't curious. Half a year ago he took an old broken pod everyone had given up on. In five pieces and as many trips moved it here. Everything could be disassembled and put back together. Where there's a will there's a way. Replaced parts, tested and finally got it working again after two months. Was the only time he felt so engaged and fulfilled, while Audrey neglected and pushed him away.

After the pod was repaired he tinkered more. Software, firmware and finally settings. Even took a twelve hour test run in the pod one weekend. Entertainment park scenario. Nice, safe and innocent fun. But there was no memory addition or suppression involved there. This would be different, much more dangerous. Fortunately he pilfered all the necessary drugs from his former workplace. Were only needed on start of scenario, lasted for as long as was needed.

The world record for staying in a VR scenario continuously was a year. Doubt he could break that, but could hope. Nutrient tanks were simple things, contents even simpler and purchasable anywhere. His meager savings accomplished the task. They were sealed and would last forever when prepared. Same with the saline tanks. They could be chained and linked together. One to be used sequentially after the other. Racks had to be built for that purpose. Spent three days welding racks and then attaching tanks to the walls of the basement.

It wasn't pretty, but it was functional. Settings could be altered. The default ones would feed a human just above optimal levels. Mere survival required a lot less. During that week he tested the buildings power, very stable with no interruptions. Would be silly to go in and die a few hours later to a power outage. Or worse, be forced out of the scenario back into this world. He so wished for that skeletal arm back now. For that pride in survival, that desire to live one more day, one more breath.

The scenario, his scenario was the one thing forgotten during all the theft. Had to go back to the VR Center. Entered the building without anyone throwing a glance. His security clearance was obviously still in place since all the doors opened as usual. Scenario would be in the memory chip storage room. Every guest would have his own personal one. A preloaded set of parameters and memories were downloaded to a memory chit. Afterward it was saved and kept for at least two years, just in case the customer wished to resume the scenario. Westmore so badly wanted to pick up where he left off.

Easy to find, all sorted by name in the endless drawers. On the way out his eyes opened wide, Blake walking down the corridor in one of his ever so rare outings. Spotted Westmore immediately and nodded while approaching. No malice or suspicion in those eyes, yet.
- Ah Nathan. Mmm, how have you been? - his former boss asked.
- Good Good.
- May I ask...
- Just... visiting some friends. Got a lot of time on my hands.
- Ah. Well. You are always welcome at the Center. Always welcome to visit. Have you found employment yet?
- No. - he shrugged with open hands - Not yet. Still looking.
- Ah well. Not easy these days. There may be another center opening. It would be far away down south though. I only got the notification today. If you want I can recommend you. You have always been an outstanding technician here.
- Erm, that would be great. - Westmore started to get nervous. Why was Blake so adamant to help him now. - Soon, or?
- It will be a couple of months. But I will surely put your name forward if you wish.
- Well. If I don't find anything in a month I will give you call. - Can't have Blake searching for him later. - If I don't, you can assume I've found something. Busy you know, pursuing career.
- Alright. I will wait for your call. - "Gee, thanks for the voice of confidence boss" he thought as Blake nodded thoughtfully.
- Thanks. Well, I have to go now. See you around mr. Blake.

Nodded turned around and left down the corridor. Westmore was painfully aware of the bulge in his trouser pocket. Blake was too fat to notice, every bulge was normal to that blob. Outside the center he took out the memory chit and kissed it. A blank grey cartridge with black letters laser printed on. "The grey wastes" at the top with "Nathan Westmore" at the bottom. One last stop.

At home he decided to leave a message for his mother. Practiced in front of the camera mirror, then finally spoke;
- Hey mom. I'm taking your advice and going on a trip to find myself. It will be educational and help me find a career. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. Seize the day eh! If you don't hear from me for a while... know that I'm okay and I love you. Take care.
Hoped that didn't sound like a goodbye, even if it was.

Shut down all the lights and canceled all subscriptions. God knows why he had any in the first place. Paid bills half a year up front, just in case that might set someone looking. Looked down the corridor on his way out. Never knew a single neighbor, not really. In ten years living here never had the desire to know any of them. Better off. Busy afternoon, had to share the tube car with several people. Today of all days!

Back at the abandoned building Westmore stared at the pod. Half of it was brand new, technically. Should last a long while. How long... no one could tell. Was willing to bet no one, absolutely no one would go looking for him. All the better. The chubby hand stung his eyes, resented it now. Time to go. With the suit on and everything ready he spoke the command in a clear voice: "Activate immersion". As the light washed over his closed eye lids Westmore thought what an outdated phrase that was. Nobody called it that in decades. Yet it was still the default command for starting a scenario alone. Consciousness faded quickly. A different Nathan woke up moments later.

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