the Art of Breaking Up

Chapter Two

Lisa looked at me like I'd grown two heads and had just asked if she thought a third one would be a solid choice.

"He's right there. Why not ask him in person? You know you can talk to people in real life, right?" she asked.

Her nose wrinkled. "Soo...?" She tried guessing the anacronym.

"We think of ourselves as SOILED, thank you."

She rolled her eyes and fought an encouraging smile as she got up. "I'm going to ask him now."

I watched her walk away.

I didn't have to ask her what she was going to ask him. She was going to do what she always did and end up with a date at the end of it. I was less of the 'date first, kiss me later' kind and more the 'it just happened' type. Sometimes with an 'oops' at the beginning of it.

Although, at that point in time, neither scenario was particularly enticing. There seemed something weird about engaging in anything of an even vaguely romantic nature with the knowledge that my parents had apparently given up on theirs.

But there was Lisa, going about her usual business like everything was normal. It wasn't normal. It was... Well, it was difficult to put into words exactly what it was.

It felt like final exams were already here, only I hadn't been to any of the classes and they were going to be entirely in French – of which my grasp was minimal at best.

It felt like those times your body twitches when you're almost asleep and you come back to full consciousness feeling like you're falling. Only the sensation of heightened adrenaline and racing heart was near constant.

I'd never before felt so restless and cooped up. My hands fidgeted non-stop. I'd chewed a raw patch on the inside of my bottom lip. I kept picking up my phone, although I didn't really know what I wanted to do with it when I was looking at it.

I was in the midst of a sea of people and yet I felt lost. Uncertain. Alone. Scared. But, at the same time, I felt surrounded. Confined. Cramped. Scrutinised.

It was the first time I'd felt that way and I didn't care for it.

"He's going to pick me up at seven-thirty on Friday night," I heard Lisa say.

I blinked and wondered how much time I'd spent stressing out about the new feeling of freaked out dread that seemed to now make up who I was as a person.

"Friday?" I said as I cobbled some kind of coherent thought together. "Nice." It was then I noticed the person standing next to her and waved.

Lisa nodded. "I also picked up a stray."

Erin and I grinned.

"Wondered where you'd got to," I said to her.

She sighed as she joined us. "Line at Tuck was massive."

Erin made three in our little inner circle. Others came and went as they flitted about the Common Room, spending a bit of time with everyone. It hadn't always been that way. But, it seemed, put a whole year level in a room together and it inevitably breaks down the majority of those resentments or feuds or disjointedness between cliques. As an inherently introverted person, I tended to stick to my spot. As my best friend, Lisa stuck to it with me. As an avid fan of Lisa, Erin was found with us more often than not.

"Is his backseat as roomy as they say?"

I wasn't sure who 'they' were, but they did tend to be proverbial in these circumstances. Besides, that was something I didn't know.