Chapter 86

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Auriga heard the front door shut and bolted awake, her shoulder aching and twinging. She grabbed her wand with her left hand and pointed it at the doorway, waiting for the person to walk through.

The footsteps stopped. "Hello?" came Remus's voice.

Auriga steadied herself with a deep breath. "I'm in here," she called back, her voice hoarse and her throat sore from crying.

Remus's head appeared round the doorframe, followed by his wand. His eyes were wide with shock, and his mind seemed unable to comprehend her sudden appearance. "Auriga," he said, his voice barely more than a whisper. "I-I thought you were dead."

Auriga didn't lower her wand. "Where did we first meet?" she asked him.

He deliberated for a moment. "The Ministry of Magic," he said. He looked for a moment like he was going to carry on, but he stopped himself. Satisfied, Auriga lowered her wand, and Remus took the seat next to her. "I saw the blood in the hallway," he explained.

"You look dreadful," she said. He did. His eyes were red with dark rings under them. He had fresh scars all over him, and he generally looked rough and shaken.

"So do you," he commented, eyeing her messy hair, her puffy red eyes and her bandaged shoulder. "What happened?" he pointed to the bandages, that Auriga now noticed had bled through a little.

"I ran into some Death Eaters on the way," said Auriga. "Managed to disapparate away."

Remus nodded. "I thought you were dead," he repeated. His voice sounded sore and pained, as though he still believed what he said to be true. "When you sent that message to the wedding...and then we found out Kingsley and the Minister were dead. Everyone just assumed they'd killed you too. And no one heard from you-"

"I've been in hiding," said Auriga. "At a Ministry safehouse. Scrimgeour...he gave his life for me." She swallowed to stop the tears. He wasn't the only one who was dead at her hand.

"When did you get here?" asked Remus. "Last night?" Auriga nodded. He swallowed nervously. "Can I take a look? At your injury?"

"No, it's OK," said Auriga quickly. "It was cursed. I'll be fine though."

"Let me look, Auriga," he said, his voice more commanding and firm. Uncharacteristically so.

"Really," Auriga assured him. "It's-"

"You left the dittany and silver powder out," Remus said. His voice was bitter, and when Auriga met his eyes they were full of guilt and a pleading pain. "Let me look." Auriga didn't protest, and he removed the bandages, his fingers gentle and careful.

He moved her hair over her other shoulder, grazing her neck as she did. Auriga let out a tiny gasp at his touch, but played it off as a wince of pain. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"It's OK," she said quietly.

"It doesn't look too swollen or enflamed," he said, more to himself. "I don't think it's infected. We'll wait and see." He picked a clean towelette out his cupboard and wet it with a bit of water and dittany, before dabbing carefully at her shoulder. Auriga really did wince once or twice, but gritted her teeth to help her through. Then, Remus washed his hands and re-applied the silver paste, before applying more bandages to it.

He made two cups of tea, placing one in front of Auriga, before sitting back down and staring at the table, looking haunted and sick. "I'm so sorry," he whispered, unable to meet her eyes.

"What for?" asked Auriga, already aware of what his answer would be.

Remus's head shot up, and Auriga realised his eyes had filled with tears. "I made you like this," he hissed. "I've ruined your life!"

"I don't remember you doing anything, Remus," said Auriga firmly. "I remember me coming to you on a full moon and reaping the consequences of my actions. This had nothing to do with you." Remus didn't look convinced, but his eyes retreated down to the table nonetheless.

"I'm sorry for putting you in this position," said Auriga, ignoring the pain in her shoulder as she reached out and placed her hand lightly on his. He jolted at her touch, but she didn't remove it. "I wasn't in my right mind, and neither were you. It wasn't fair."

Remus nodded, his eyes closed, looking wounded and beyond any relief. "What do you mean?" he asked, finally meeting her eyes once more. "You weren't in your right mind?"

Auriga inhaled sharply and bit her lip, feeling the tears forming in her eyes as she remembered why she had come. It seemed so distant, so lost now. But that didn't numb the stinging.

She retracted her hand. "I didn't tell anyone at the time," said Auriga, her voice a croak. "But the night Moody died, I saw my father, and he let me go. Vol-"

"NO!" roared Remus suddenly, and Auriga jumped so much that she spilled hot tea all over herself. "Sorry," he said, waving his wand and cleaning it up. "The name's tabooed. If you say it there'll be snatchers on the doorstep in minutes."

"Right," said Auriga, taking a shaking breath and starting again. "You-Know-Who punished him and...he cracked. He...he k-killed himself." Auriga cursed herself for crying in front of him, but then decided she didn't care. "B-because of me!"

Remus waited until she had calmed down a little before speaking. "I want you to listen to me very carefully, Auriga," he said, taking her hand in his. "This was not your fault. Your father made his choice, and yes, you have to live with that. But it was his choice." Auriga nodded, quickly, wiping her cheeks with her free hand and sniffing.

"Now, I think we both need to rest," continued Remus. "And to heal. So you can take the spare bed and we'll talk again later, alright?" Auriga nodded again, before Remus stood. Still clutching his hand tightly, Auriga followed him up and into the spare room, climbing into bed and drifting back to sleep.

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