Eraserhead and Scribe III

Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Scribe rose early two days later to return to Japan with Aizawa. She could feel his excited anticipation of returning home with her, but she couldn't fully share it. For one thing, it had taken her an embarrassingly long time to pack her belongings. Though most of what she had could easily remain in the small apartment, what she did want to take had become scattered about.

And when she stopped to look for it, a surprising sadness overtook her.

His arms slid around her. What's wrong?

She looked around herself but found it difficult to answer, at least in a way that wouldn't hurt him. So she just shook her head.

He turned her gently to face him. His eyes were sympathetic. We can still contact your family.

She shook her head again, more emphatically. I don't want to do that. Not yet.

Okay. He lowered his gaze. Are you afraid to return to Japan? Because of Eri?

No. She wished she could make the negative more emphatic but she couldn't. Not really. Maybe a little, but I think... She looked around again and sighed. I'm afraid of losing who I am again.

He frowned, cocking his head. She smiled and placed a hand on his face. It's just that we are so strong, my love. I'm...here I was strong on my own. I liked that.

He turned his head and kissed her hand. I love your strength. I love who you are. I would never want to take that from you.

She lowered her head and nodded. Most of her believed him. Most of her wanted to lose herself in the "we" that was strong. The "we" that had a purpose and could carry on no matter what was happening in the rest of the world.

And still she remembered the lonely evenings in the apartment without someone else to be her center. Without someone else, she'd discovered an unexpected strength all her own, an ability to survive and even be content on her own.

I know that's there, though. If I need it. And that in itself is a gift. She smiled into Aizawa's eyes. And as long as I don't need it, I can be grateful.

Something else bothered her in the night as Aizawa slept beside her. Did Shigaraki have an enemy closer than he thought? Masumi's words haunted her. You and Shigaraki were so sure you weren't seen, weren't you? But maybe there was someone else nearby.

There wasn't. Shigaraki stepped out of the shadows. Dabi wouldn't betray me.

She sat up, Aizawa's arms falling away from her. Someone gave Masumi the DNA he needed. Are you certain of Dabi's loyalty, Tomura?

He paused as if thinking, then shrugged, his oddly scarred face rueful. As certain as anyone can be. How certain are you of Eraser's love?

She raised her eyebrows and he snorted. Yeah, maybe not that certain, but still. He focused on her. I'm glad you made it out of that okay. What's next for you?

I'm coming back to Japan, Tomura. She watched him carefully for his reaction. With Shota.

He nodded. I thought you would. Eventually. He paused, looking down at his hands. Remember what I said. I won't be safe for you anymore, pretty. Even you.

She stood and took a step toward him. I remember what you said. You said now you can choose.

He looked up at her, his eyes startled. I won't choose what you want me to choose.