The Quest for Fireworks

We Go Together

    Every year at the end of September, the town has a festival in the park near my apartment. Amusement rides, carnival games, food vendors, the whole thing. When I was a teenager, it was a big deal. Me and my friends would put on makeup that we were too young to be wearing and roll into the park like we thought we were badass. Because we did.
    As an adult, I avoided it at all costs. It was just another place to see everyone in town that you didn't want to see. And when you were in a relationship that you were ashamed of, you didn't want to see anybody.
    This year, I actually want to go. I want to take Jordan, I want to have fun with my friends. So I sent a group text to the usual suspects and told them to meet Jordan and I at the ticket booth at 7:00.
    Riley rode with Jordan and I saying with the amount of exes she was bound to see, she deserved to get wasted off overpriced carnival beer. Sierra and Aria beat us there. Ben said he wasn't down to get shot at a hillbilly hoedown and even though this is New Jersey, I understood what he meant.
    Now we're just waiting for Megan and Corinne. Megan asked me if it would be weird if she brought her and I said absolutely not. Whatever Corinne and I had is long over and I'm excited for her and Megan. Things seem to be going well and I want Megan to feel like she can share her happiness with me.
    While we wait, Jordan buys 50 tickets although I assure him that's way too many for the amount of rickety, barely-put-together rides I will actually go on.
    "Someone will use them," is his argument.
    Megan and Corrine walk up, hand in hand and I can't deny the sting of jealousy. It's just a left over emotion from a time where I thought I was undeserving.
    "Does this feel like the last scene in Grease to anyone else?" Megan asks.
    "All the gang's together," Aria says, mimicking a line from the movie.
    I laugh and pull Jordan closer to me. Clearly we're the Danny and Sandy of the group and I look forward to riding a car off into the heavens with him.
    "Where to first?" Sierra asks.
    "Scrambler," Megan, Aria and I say at the same time.
    All the years we came here together, we always went on the Scrambler first. It's the most chaotic ride that I'll actually get on. The four of us used to cram ourselves into one car when we were smaller but now we go off in pairs; Jordan and I, Megan and Corrine, Aria and Sierra. Riley opted out, choosing to go get her first beer instead but I think she didn't want to mess her hair up.
    The ride starts and it's worse than I remember. The cars are connected to arms that extend and rotate causing a slingshot motion over and over again. The gravitational pull forces me to squish Jordan with my entire body. We laugh the whole time and I catch glimpses of everyone else laughing, hair flying, even Riley standing on the side waving as we spin.
    Once we recover from being scrambled, we make our way to the slow, smooth carousel. We all choose a horse, Riley picking the bench since she's wearing a skirt and doesn't know how to sit side saddle.
    Jordan and I hold hands and Sierra makes puking sounds behind us. I get that fuzzy, teenager feeling again, like I'm 16 and this is my first boyfriend and my friends are being embarrassing about it. But I love it.
    After the carousel, we all agree it's time for greasy, fried fair food. We all go to different vendors and buy a few things before meeting back up at a picnic table to eat everything family style. We have funnel cake, fried Oreos, corn dogs, French fries, and kettle popcorn.
    We eat and talk and laugh and of course Sierra throws popcorn at Megan which starts a brawl. Most of the popcorn ends up on the ground and I feel bad for whoever spent their money on that.
    "Can I steal you for a second?" Jordan asks me and I'm reminded of The Bachelorette.
    "Of course," I say, holding out my hand for him to help me off the bench. "We'll catch up with you guys later," I tell everyone.
    Sounds of scandal and excitement erupt from the table and I roll my eyes before walking away. "Don't forget you're my ride," Riley calls after us.
    I give her a thumbs up without turning around.
    Jordan takes my hand and leads me toward the back of the park where the Ferris wheel stands high above the surrounding trees. I know that's where he's taking me and I think about reminding him of my fear of heights but the excitement of riding the Ferris wheel with my boyfriend, like a teenager, takes over.
    Jordan tears off the right amount of tickets leaving more than a sheet full. He jogs out of the line and up to a group of kids. A few seconds later he jogs back without the sheet of tickets.
    "You're a good guy," I tell him.
    He shrugs. "I try."
    When it's our turn to get on, the butterflies have completely taken over. I'm nervous and excited but mostly nervous. I haven't been on a Ferris wheel since I was too young to care about how far off the ground my feet were.
    "Don't let go," I say, squeezing his hand as the car slowly ascends.
    "Never," he says, squeezing mine back.
    We reach the top and of course we stop. I close my eyes tight, fear finally taking over. I hear Jordan chuckle before I feel his hand on my cheek, pulling me to him.
    I keep my eyes closed and let him kiss me. As our lips touch, a loud pop followed by a whistle happens in the distance. Then a loud bang and a flash of brightness. I pull away from him and open my eyes to see the bright pink dots start to fade.
    "I love you," Jordan whispers as another firework bursts open in the sky.
    This is it. The amazement, the beauty, the nervousness, the excitement. This is the feeling I've already had these past few weeks. What I've found is somehow better than what I thought I was looking for. Even before this moment, I found fireworks.