In Flames // 9-1-1 Fox (seasons 1-4)

fifty-seven

"I never..." Her voice cracked and she squeezed her eyes shut. "I never got to tell him..."

"You will. You will."

"It was supposed to be me." Grief stained her words and dripped down her throat and into her heart, her bones, her lungs. "I've asked God a million times. I've begged him. It should have been me."

"Mariana, don't you dare say that."

"Buck," Bobby said from the entrance of the porch. "We need you."

The team all cast worried glances at the practically catatonic brunette, but they knew they needed to focus on Eddie first. Buck looked around until he saw an officer standing off to the side of the porch. He quickly hopped up and moved to grab her attention.

"Hey, I was wondering if you could help me with something. One of our guys is trapped under the mud and we need to get him out but...we need someone to watch over one of our teammates. Can you just make sure she's alright?"

The officer eyed him carefully before looking over at Mariana who appeared so small in the huge overcoat and her crumpled form. The woman nodded and extended her hand.

"Faith Johnson. I'll get her to warm up and keep her dry," she promised.

"I'm Buck and that's Mariana. Thank you so much."

He dashed off to join the others while Faith approached Mariana. She gently laid a hand on Mariana's shoulder and the brunette flinched away, huddling back into the coat around her. Faith pulled her hand away and instead sat down on the dirty and muddy porch in front of her.

"Hi Mariana. Do you need anything or do you just want to sit here for a bit?"

"I need him safe," she whispered out. Her fingers enclosed around the polaroid in her hand and she bowed her head, letting out a broken sob. "I can't...I can't do this without him. What do I tell Chris? I-"

She fell silent, numbly staring at the ground before her. Her hands trembled and her eyes filled with unshed tears but she didn't let out a sound. Faith just sat and watched the broken woman before her.

It was like a movie played out in her mind. Every touch, every smile, and every laugh. She inhaled the scent of him from his coat once more, fresh tears springing to her eyes at the thought of yesterday morning.

Mariana groaned at the sound of the alarm ringing out from next to her. She shut her eyes and burrowed down into her pillow in an attempt to block out the annoying chirps and Eddie's laugh.

"C'mon, baby," he rasped out, voice hoarse from waking up. His lips trailed up and down the length of her spine as she sighed against his touch. "Gotta get up."

"Can't we just stay here forever?" she sighed, rolling over so she could face him. He cupped her face with his hands and kissed her deeply as she threaded her fingers through his short hair.

"I wish," he murmured. "You, in our bed, wearing this shirt..."

"Edmundo Diaz, are you objectifying me?" she teased.

He raised himself up on his arm so he could look down on her with a cheesy grin on his face. "Are you saying you don't want to be objectified by me? You're wearing my shirt that has my name on it and you and I both know that I have a thing for that."

"Oh yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?"

He leaned down to whisper in her ear and her eyes widened at his words while her breathing hitched. She blinked rapidly and turned her head to look up at him.