heather {completed}

Heather II

Only if you knew
How much I liked you, but I watch your eyes
As she walks by

Eddie remembers when Heather first moved to Derry, blissfully ignorant of the horrors residing in town.

The other Losers already met her at school, and said she was pretty okay, but Eddie and Richie had yet to meet her, but they were about to.  On the way to the clubhouse, Richie poked Eddie's side painfully.

"Ouch, what the hell, Richie!  That fucking hurt." It was only after he finished he noticed Richie's eyes.  They were facing forward, looking at someone.  Eddie followed his eyes and found the person Richie was looking at. New people in Derry were rare, almost unheard of, so a new face would stand out. This was probably the new girl, Heather.

She was, well, everything he wasn't.  She was pretty, not Beverly pretty but still, really pretty. She had a blinding smile that made the birds sing, and she radiated something otherworldly. Probably the best part about her was that she was a girl. He wasn't attracted to her, but he knew that Richie had just found someone that he's always wanted, someone that wasn't Eddie.  The revelation stung, but not as much as he thought.  He knew that there was no universe in which Richie could ever look at him with anything other the friendship.  It just wasn't the way things worked.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when Richie started speaking, but he only caught the end of his sentence.

"—I'm gonna see if she'll go.  Wish me luck!"  Eddie couldn't get a word in as Richie dashed forward to talk with the new girl.  Eddie watched with wide eyes as Richie approached the girl with the confidence of a James Bond spy. He barely heard what was being said, but it seemed someone else found the part of Richie that many never see. And Richie's face, the soft smile, that boisterous laugh, everything he did with this girl made Eddie's heart die just a little. They both shone so brightly together that it was painful watching them interact.

Eddie could imagine what happens next: a dozen dates, maybe Prom King and Queen, college together, and eventually, marriage. All the things he wanted to have with Richie, but would never have. As for Eddie, he would be a single loser, stuck up on a high school crush that never would go away. Maybe somewhere along the way, he would end up with some girl that pushed him around like his mom. She might even be as fat as his mom.

Eddie pushed those horrible thoughts away as he heard Heather laugh in delight with whatever Richie said. It was rare that others find Richie's jokes tolerable, much less funny. only the Losers and himself could find the humour in Richie's jokes. That was what made her so unique, so perfect for Richie, so even though Eddie wanted to hate her, he couldn't bring himself to do that, because she made Richie happy. And Richie's happiness was everything that Eddie wanted for Richie, even if he wasn't the one making Richie happy. So he put on his best smile, walked over there, and introduced himself, each step towards her making his heartbreak just a little. His mother and doctor might say he needs his inhaler to breathe, but that wasn't true. No, Eddie found that Richie's smile gave him the strength to breathe in this harsh world.

If Eddie looked closer in Richie's eyes, he might have seen the look Richie gave him, a look that said the same thing. If Eddie needed Richie to breathe, Richie needed Eddie to live.