Love vs. Lust

(23) Love vs. Lust

Love vs. Lust

Chapter 23

Dinner was very awkward. My mom was friendly towards Gordon and it seemed like she really liked him but anger was radiating from both Cole and Conner.

“Maybe I should go” Gordon whispered to me as soon as we all finished eating.

“No, I invited you and they will just have to deal with it” I replied loud enough so that everybody could hear. Conner glared at me and if looks could kill I would be dead. Cole looked pissed and hurt and my mom looked confused. I didn’t want to stay around them any longer then I had to so I turned to my mom and asked what we all wanted to know.

“Did you get everything organized at work?” I questioned.

“Yes sweetie, I’ll be leaving Friday morning. I don’t have all the new addresses and telephone numbers yet but I should be getting them tomorrow” she answered looking a bit sad.

“That’s good, I’m really glad for you” I said trying to make her feel better, it looked like it worked because she smiled as she got up from the table. I took that as my queue and got up to.

“Come on” I said holding my hand out to Gordon. He looked a bit hesitant with everybody staring at us but got up and took my hand. I led him to my room without looking back to see anybody’s reaction.

Once we were in my room I locked the door behind me and turned to look at him. He looked out of place in my small room and I could tell that he was nervous which was weird considering he is always so upbeat and cheerful.

“Don’t worry, they’re not going to try to kill you while my mom is in the house” I joked grabbing his hand and pulling him over to my bed. He laughed at my joke but still looked nervous as he sat down on my bed with me.

“Ok, what’s wrong? I’ve never seen you so nervous before” I asked squeezing his hand that I was still holding. He looked at me and then looked away like he was embarrassed.

“You can tell me” I whispered trying to encourage him.

“I know, it’s just that I don’t want you to think I am weird or something” he answered looking back at me. I could tell he was afraid that I might judge him from the look in his eyes.

“I already think you are weird, that’s what I like about you” I said leaning forward and pressing my lips against his. I don’t know why I did it but it felt so right that I didn’t question myself. He kissed me back gently but pulled away within a few seconds just like last night.

“Why do you keep on pulling away?” I asked our faces still so close together that I could taste his warm breath on my lips.

“Because I really like you and I don’t want to screw it up” he answered moving away from me.

His words stunned me into silence, I didn’t know what to say so I just stared at him.

“You wanted to know what’s wrong with me, why I’m so nervous?” Gordon asked still looking worried.

“Yes” I whispered softly still unable to form a proper sentence.

“I’m nervous because I’m alone with you in your room and I want nothing more than to kiss you but I’m afraid. I’m afraid that you might not like me after you hear my story, I’m afraid that you are going to think I’m crazy too but most of all I’m afraid of losing you” he stated looking embarrassed.