Chapter 12

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I laid down feeling the fluffy blankets on my skin. Gerard above me stroking my hair. We stared into each other's eyes for a long time. He leaned down brushing his lips against mine. One hand on my waist the other in my hair. His hair was a curtain around us making it private even though we were in the middle of no where. Our lips moved gently. I sucked on his bottom lip softly making him moan. My hands went up to his hair, my fingers tangling in his strands. I closed my eyes as I felt him kiss my cheek, neck, collarbone, leaving a trail of kisses. My mind wandered off

"You're not good enough for him" popped into my mind.

"Lisa, baby? Are you okay?" Gerard looked up at me

I didn't notice that I was crying

"I'm okay, I'm sorry" I wiped away my tears giving him a upset smile

"I'm going too fast. I'm so sorry to make feel uncomfortable. Fuck it" Gerard angrily said

"No no, it's not that. Everything is amazing. It's.... Perfect" I broke off at the end

"Please tell what's wrong Lisa. You've been acting weird all day" Gerard looked down at his hands

I took a deep breath and looked away

"I'm not good enough for you" I whispered not wanting to be heard

"What?" I looked up to see Gerard's upset face. "Who said this?"

"When you were at the signing I went into a music shop and some of your fans were saying that you have a girlfriend and they might think I'm not good enough for you" I said in a rush getting more upset as I explained

"Any chance were one of these fans my mom?" Gerard asked

"No"

"Well then we don't have to worry what they think. They don't know you. They don't control my life." Gerard hugged me

"But I'm nobody"

"You might think you're nobody but to me you're my everything" Gerard whispered in my ear

I squeezed him tight, feeling his heart beat.

"I can't believe Gerard said I'm his everything." I thought to myself

"Do you want to get comfy now and get into our pjs?" Gerard released and smiled

"Definitely" I grinned

Gerard started undressing, taking off his jacket first and tossing it in the corner. He took out his pyjamas which were a faded misfits T-shirt and batman pyjamas bottoms. He took off his T-shirt over his head. I could see his pale skin, the fairy lights making it look delicate. I reached out and touched it.

"Having fun?" Gerard giggled

"Sorry, you're skin is so soft" I blushed

"Are you not going to put on your pyjamas? I'll cover my eyes" Gerard said putting on his T-shirt and covered his eyes

I took off my jumper and T-shirt. I feel the cold air hit my skin. I just about to unhook my bra but checked to see he was peeking.

".....You're so beautiful" I saw him gazing at my body

"Gerard! You said you wouldn't look" I tried to cover myself with my hands

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist. Please don't cover yourself" He brought down my arms so they were at my side

"I hate my body. You should be disgusted by it" I looked down

"It's not disgusting! You're beautiful."

"Look at how why my skin is! Its paler than yours. My collarbones and ribs stick out so much it looks so unattractive" I sighed thinking back to when I wouldn't eat for days.

"They the most beautiful parts of you... It's natural." Gerard put a strand of hair behind my ear and hugged me

"Please try and love your body" He whispered

"Nugh" I moaned into his neck.

He kissed my shoulder rubbing his thumbs on my waist.

We both got fully dressed and started out movie marathon with cold delicious chicken carbonara. We snuggled close as the wind howled outside.

****

I woke up to the sound of the wind rattling the tent. Gerard had his arms around me, spooning me. He let out of light moan, snuggling into my neck. I turned the tablet off and put it at my side. I looked at him beside me. He breathing peaceful. His hair covering his eyes. I lightly brushed his hair away from his face.

"Uhhhh..." He moaned stretching out his arms and yawning "what time is it" He whispered lightly dropping his arm on my waist

"I think it's about 3am" I smiled loving Gerard's sleepy voice and his bed head

I snuggled myself into Gerard's chest wanting the warmth from his body

"You cold?" Gerard whispered 

"A little" I said into his chest

"Come here baby" Gerard pulled an extra blanket over us and wrapped his arms around me. His hand rubbing up and down my arm.

"Night night" Gerard said quietly kissing my forehead 

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