Changing // DISCONTINUED

Chapter Fifteen

Theme song: "Little Red Wagon" Miranda Lambert

"Now when I die they will think that I killed myself and they could have done something to stop it and didn't. They might go their whole lives thinking they killed me and you guys even and, and, and-"

I'm getting real worked up Steve just sits me on the couch calmly and pulls me close, whispering soothing things in my ear, patting my back. All I can do is hug him back and hold in my tears.

After I have my eyes under control I pull back some to look in his eyes. I last a second before I'm kissing him, he kisses me back slowly and supporting. He gently leans me back so I'm laying on the couch. I take my left leg and sat it on top of his making me feel like nothing can tear us apart.

The next thing I was conscious of is the door opening.

"Ignore her," he said talking about his mother. Rolling to be beside me never letting go his hands working their way down.

"Lizzy is everything okay you never answered your phone." A voice called down the hallway

I sat up and Isabel walked over to the couch

"Tell me you didn't..." Isabelle commanded

"We didn't, Darren is sitting right," I stopped Darren left and I never heard a sound. "Never mind,"

"Well aren't you hungry it's 8:00"

"What! We must have fallen asleep, I last remember it was about 4:00," I trailed off. My stomach growled. I guess I'm hungry.

"Yes I'm ready to eat but um," I scratched my throat "I'm more thirsty, did Crepsley, uh, give it to you?" I stuttered

"Yes it's at the house now let's go,"

She picked up her keys and I was in the car before she turned around, Steve is right behind me.

When we got to the house me a Steve both downed a bottle of blood each, afterwards we brushed our teeth and ate some dinner. And because I love that movie we watched The Boy in the Striped Pajamas in the basement. The movie ended and I heard Isabel leave. I told Steve that I'll be right back, I ran upstairs grabbed a bottle of scotch five glasses and called Darren

"Hey Darr want to come over and throw back some scotch with me?"

"I will be right there," he hung up

Time for the next boy

"So Al want to come over and get tipsy?"

"Give me 10 mineuts,"

Now for the last

"Tom want to come do shots with me and the guys, as long as you don't try to kiss me." I warned

"I will try my best to make it over there. Your house?"

I nodded then remembered he can't see me

"Yes," I hung up

Walking to the basement

"I smell alcohol," Steve sang

"Pour us all some glasses Darren is at the door," then on cue the door bell rang

They all made it and I'm sitting on Steve's lap with the whole bottle of scotch sloshing around as I move swigging from the neck.

I hear Isabelle pull in but don't worry about it. We are all drunk as hell now, wishing, once again, I had a razor. My hand went to my wrist, it started to ache. Why would it do that? I haven't cut in a couple of days, not since after Friday night, on Saterday morning. I just can't wrap my fuzzy, drunk ass head around it right now, maybe when I'm sober.