Just Close Enough to Burn (station 19)

Invisible to Me

Dear Diary,

It's been really great to work as a paramedic again, honestly it's probably even better here than it was in New York. The station 19 team is so much more of a family than any group I've ever worked with before. They were definitely hesitant to have me there at first especially considering I'm only 23 and not a firefighter, but it helped to have Captain Herrera back me up. Plus Andy helped me get acquainted. I mostly hung out with her at the station for the first few weeks which meant I also spent a good amount of time with Maya and Jack. Most people at the station don't know that Andy and Jack are a thing but I know Andy too well not to figure it out.

On top of all the personal stuff I've been out on some really crazy calls. A few days ago we got called out to a structure fire at a candy store. Some of the candy got so hot that it melted and burned the store owner. I had never seen burns like that before and we had to think quickly and figure out a way to get the molten sugar off of his skin to stop the burns from getting any worse. Travis was in the aid car with me and we used cold saline to bring the sugar temp down and quickly got him to the hospital where they could safely remove the candy. Let's just say I haven't been able to look at gummy bears the same way since.

Anyway, this week Captain Herrera had to step down after finding out that he has mesothelioma, and is leaving the station in Jack and Andy's hands until a new captain can be named. Today was Andy's first day as interim captain and boy was it a crazy one. It started off pretty normally, the team did air consumption drills while I restocked the aid car before we got a call. The fire alarm went off at Tuck's school and I could tell that Ben was nervous. We quickly got confirmation that it was a false alarm, some kid pulled it, so Travis and I left with the aid car.

We got called out pretty quickly after getting back to the station and headed over to the local retirement home to help Mr. Page, a frequent flyer. He got um... stuck in his shower chair. Travis took the seat apart with Dean's help and I mostly just kept him calm and chatted with him. I could tell he was glad to have the company but Travis figured out just how lonely he really was. He told Mr. Page, and by proxy me and Dean, about how lonely he was after his husband died. I forget most of the time that it had only been a year since Travis lost his husband; I didn't know him then so it always seems like ancient history but today I could see how much it still affects him.

Later that night we got called out to an MVC with an overturned tanker that seemed to be leaking something. Initially it looked pretty straight forward; evacuate the victims and get them to the hospital, no big deal. Vic and Warren went to treat the truck driver while I helped Dean and Travis with the driver of the car. The scene was really hot, like oddly hot, and Andy realized that the tank was leaking ethanol and we were dealing with a blue fire. Even worse, Vic and Ben were trapped in a ring of fire and the hazmat team was way too far away. Travis started to bring a hose over but Andy and I stopped him pretty quickly. I was glad that the four years I spent getting my science degree paid off and that I remembered that water would only make an ethanol fire worse. After a lot of panic, Andy found a way to get Ben and Vic out: she drove the truck right over the flames. It was insane!

I didn't think that anything else could happen that shift but just before it ended the aid car got called and Ben, Dean, and I responded. As irony would have it the call came from JJ, this girl that Dean had met earlier in the day when she brought her broken smoke alarm into the station to be fixed. We figured out that there was a fire in the crawl space above her apartment and needed to move quickly. Dean grabbed JJ and the three of us ran out of the building to call for help. Warren and Miller went back in to get more people out. I wanted to go with them but they wouldn't let me.

"I'm coming with you! We need as many of us getting people out as possible, at least until the rest of the team gets here" Mattie argued, knowing it was an uphill battle.

Ben immediately shut her down, "Don't you  even think about going into that building. Engines will be here any minute. Until then, you watch JJ." He and Dean ran off leaving Mattie alone at the aid car with a patient who didn't want to be there either. She watched them run off and sighed reluctantly before going back to treating her patient.

The team got there pretty quickly and I just watched as they all rushed in and up to the roof. As they worked to evacuate residents my job got a little busier. I had a few patients with smoke inhalation that needed oxygen and monitoring. I kept seeing flames shoot up from the roof so between patients I made sure to prep for burn victims and listen to the walkie to make sure everyone was safe. I can't tell you how stressful it is to hear someone say that the roof is about to collapse while six of your friends are standing on that roof. Of course I was freaked out by it more than any of them haha. They were all fine; it just feels different when you can't do anything but watch.

After shift Andy called Maya and Vic to come day drink with her. After she called them she realized that I'm finally old enough to drink with her too and texted me to come over. Sitting on the porch railing and taking shots with them I realized that I was actually friends with these people. Not just work acquaintances, but actual friends and it was really nice. We let Andy vent about her dad, congratulated her on an amazing first shift as captain, and just chilled for a while. Everyone was joking about how we treat ourselves after a long day. Let's just say there was a pretty big difference; Andy said she goes rock climbing while Maya countered with all the sex she has. Vic and I just laughed as I tried not to fall off the porch railing.

Overall it was a really crazy day but had a good end. I'm off next shift when Jack is captain but I can't wait to hear about it and see what Andy does as captain again in a few days.

-Mattie