March 8, 1940

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March 8, 1940

Dear Diary,

Shalom. I used to live in a big pretty house with white walls and drapes and my own big bedroom. I used to have a whole bookshelf, full of nothing but marvelous books. But Mrs. Simon tried her best to make her attic a home for us, and eventually it became one. There are so many memories connected to the three- roomed attic. My plan was to never leave, not even once the war was over and done with. Only then I could go to school and walk the streets without fearing for my life. I don't want to go to America. I don't care if it's safer. I refuse to leave my home and my family. Mama says I'm being stubborn, but that's just her opinion, and her wrong opinion at that. We're doing fine here. We were the lucky ones. Cassy was taken away only because we weren't careful enough. But we'll be more careful next time, so we don't have to worry about that. Yet Mama still does worry about that. I guess that's just what mothers do. I really don't want to leave, but on the other hand I really want to meet Grandpa. But I'm still not leaving. I love our room, even if it is rather cramped. I love the pretty old attic with all the flowered white couches and chairs, and our old wooden table Papa made before he was taken away. I can still smell the nauseating aroma of Papa'a tobacco, and Grammy's famous chicken soup. I can almost hear Cassy scoling me for using that tube of lipgloss she was trying to make last the war. I remember how scared I was when a Nazi stopped me in the woods. My Aryan looks made him a little less suspicious, so he didn't immediately take me away. But he hadn't seen Cassy, so she snuck up behind him and hit him on the head with a heavy stone. He had passed out, and we swiftly ran away. I miss Cassy, I miss Grammy, and I miss Daddy. I keep praying that one day they'll show up at the attic door like they were never gone, but I know in my heart I'll never see their faces again. 

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