Rise [Bruno Mars]

Chapter twenty-five

Chapter twenty-five

Nan's homestead was surrounded by trees. Skinny, tall ones, the near-naked branches grazing the silver freckled night sky in undulating movements. The world lay thinly covered in a white frost as the four of us trudged through, in large coats and bags thrown over our shoulders.

Ryan was chuckling. I noted some astonishment in the high tone of his. “We just got kicked out of a safe house. A safe house. What are you, a kid?”

In the corner of my eye I saw his statement directed at me. For a moment, I thought it better not to reply, but no good would have come out of that. I was tired. “Because I'm the one who opened the unit alone. I'm the one who went down the stairwell alone. I'm the one who went through Nan's stuff alone. So if you want to call me a kid, better include your best friend, because he was there too.” I stepped in front of Ryan, causing the whole group to stop. “Or better yet, don't even talk to me that way. Admit it, Ryan. You're jealous Bruno didn't tell you what he's been dreaming. But he told me. He didn't show you about the unit after everyone went off to bed. But he showed me. It wasn't you and him uncovering secrets. You, his best friend for more than ten years. It was me and him.”

Ryan's fingers curled at his side. 

“Don't treat me like this because you're angry you're best friend loves me, and he's not fooled by the mistakes I've made, and will continue to make. I've been there already, okay? Where I felt like I wasn't worth him and I will not—I won't let you drag me back there again. Don't treat me like this.” My voice wavered slightly. “I've done nothing to you, Ryan.” 

I knew that Ris and Bruno were watching, and I felt raw, open, because this was something to tell Ryan in private. But I'd had enough. 

Ryan laughed. It was a whole, full, hands on your knees, laugh. It disrupted the verglas on the branches. “She said his name, Bruno!”

“What?” Bruno said flatly.

“Joseph's name. When she was unconscious and shit? Kept saying his name.”

I stiffened. “That's not true.”

“Not true!” Ryan burst out. “Ris?”

Ris blushed, face already pink from the cold. Her eyes jerked to mine, then jerked away. And she nodded. She'd heard me, too.

I turned to Bruno, who was still as stone, staring as if he didn't know me at all. “Bruno, even if I did, what does that mean? It doesn't mean anything.”

He glanced away, fixing on the other two. “Come on. We gotta get to the car.”

“Jeep.” Ryan grinned. Bruno's shoulders brushed mine when he walked past, Ryan careful not to touch, Ris careful not to look. I watched their backs, moving further away, feeling like I'd just been shot in the chest, and the result was a crater, not a hole, one that could never entirely be filled. I bit away tears, tightening my grip on the strap of the bag I carried.

“Why are they walking away from you?”

His voice was low, unhurried. I looked up at Joseph. Pale and beautiful, his hands clasped behind his back. The surprise of seeing him here left quickly, chased after utter relief.  “Because it's the easiest thing they've ever done.”

“Don't belittle yourself, Adrian. You are special to me,” he said. “You should keep up with them. It's not safe being in the woods alone.”

“I think I already know that from what happened last time.” I began to walk, though I had to give myself a push. It took everything in me not to sink to my knees because of the horrible feeling of rejection.