Love it All Away🌙 : An Introductory Novella

Chapter 10: Camila (i can s€€ you)

Mateo is driving too fast and he hasn't said a word to me, leaving me feeling uneasy. "Teo...I."

"Just give me a few minutes please." He cuts me off putting his hand up to silence me. Rude! I roll my eyes. Is he upset?

"You're being crazy and putting me in danger and I don't appreciate it so you either slow down or let me off. NOW!" I demand.

    I immediately feel the truck slow down and I'm relieved. I'm wondering where the hell we're going, does he even know where we're going or is he just driving? I'm actually a little shaken up by his behavior. For the first time I don't feel safe with him.

Is this our first fight? What exactly is he mad about here? It feels strange to think that he and I are in a relationship at all but to think that we're already fighting seems more along the lines of our nature. My past choices are going to haunt us and I hope he's ready because something deep down inside of me is adamant that I want him to be the one that helps me conquer it all. I'll just lay it all out for him. If he stays then he'll have my whole heart but if he walks away, then I will never give all of me to anyone else again. In a weird, ironic way he has a lot of my past and now I want him to have my future. The only thing standing in our way is the gap in between that holds all of my mistakes and traumas.

He turns into a wooded area and drives down a dark, gravely path. I'm growing more uneasy not knowing where we'll end up. This is the part in the movie when the ditzy girl who got in the truck with the hot guy goes to die. Our speed finally slows down then loops the truck around to back up and parks in reverse. I watch him exit the truck still brooding in silence as he comes around to open the door and offers me his hand, I take it and hop out.

We're at a lake. It's so peaceful and beautiful. I inhale the light, musky smell and listen to the night. I look up at the sky and watch as the moon plays peekaboo with the clouds. When I look over at Mateo he's watching me with admiration, he quite enjoys watching me. His expression confuses me, yet again. Is he mad or not?

"Come." He says and pulls the tailgate of the truck down. I walk over and he helps me up to sit. He doesn't join me, instead he stands in between my legs.

"I'm sorry. I just needed to calm myself down and get away from there. I didn't want to create more chaos within the chaos. I get angry and then I feel like I can lose control so it's better to separate myself from it all. Anyway, I sound like a lunatic. How are you? I missed you today." He says, confusing me with the change in mood yet again. I stare at him wide eyed in surprise as I try to process the layers of information he's just divulged. For the first time I realize that he might be just as complicated as I am. He's just better at keeping up the facade. He speaks again. "Besides I like it when it's just the two of us. I don't like sharing and I definitely didn't like seeing another guy with his hands on you." That's a very honest and a somewhat possessive revelation. He's being very forthcoming. He missed me? None of this is making sense to me. I feel like I'm trapped on a ferris wheel. Round and round we go.

I slug him on the shoulder taking him by surprise. He laughs and he rubs the sore spot. "What the hell was that for!? Here I am trying to save the night by telling you that I missed you and you hit me?"

"You missed me? Then why the hell haven't you text or called me? You don't just ignore me all day then say you miss me, especially not after you basically just told me that you're obsessive and possessive." He lets out a quiet laugh and closes his eyes as if he's realized something.

"Oh, I forgot about that. I lost my phone, actually I think I left it somewhere in your room. I figured that you would have found it and known why I hadn't called. I stopped by your house today, twice but no one was home. I was planning to stop by again when I left the party but then I ran into you there. I was disappointed to find you weren't home. I had hoped to spend the day with you. I never expected to see you at the party tonight." He doesn't comment any further on the toxic traits I just called him out on.