Love it All Away🌙 : An Introductory Novella

Chapter 9: Camila (haunted)

    My dad puts the car in drive and I don't bother to look back. I'll come back another day to visit Nico in peace. I watch as Jasmine takes my father's hand in hers and it makes me happy to know he has someone. When I'm with them I feel like we're a family. I feel like they allow me to be a part of something that wasn't dismantled just because my brother died, even if Jasmine didn't exist in my life at the time. I'm eighteen and I'll be off to make my own life soon and it's comforting to know that he won't be alone. It's a shame that I can't say the same for my mom. I know that she's been dating Mark but I don't see her glowing the way my dad does.

    Whether it's with Mark or some other poor soul, I hope that one day she'll allow herself to be happy again. I wish that she could see that she is standing in her own way. I'm so grateful that I've realized this about myself now and not later. I've wasted enough time.

    What a day! I don't feel like I can stay home stuck in my thoughts tonight. I pull my phone out and text Sam.

Me
Any plans for tonight?

I look out the window awaiting her response. I need to start getting out. I want to find whatever a normal eighteen year old's life is supposed to be. I've already experienced a lot of things I should've never experienced at my age or ever for that matter but unfortunately I can't undo it. I can only try to be better moving forward. I feel my phone buzz in my lap.

Sam
Hey you! How was your dinner? I missed you at school yesterday, did you ditch AGAIN?

Me
Dinner was actually nice. Came home during lunch. I was wondering if we could hang out tonight?

Sam
My kind of hanging out or yours? You know how I feel about your idea of a good time.

I sigh, Sam has definitely expressed her disapproval for the way I've been behaving. The last time I called her she made it very clear that she was done saving me and that she didn't want that role in my life anymore. She said that a day would soon come when she wasn't going to pick up the phone and that it wasn't fair for me to put her in a position to have to possibly live with the regret or guilt if something happened to me. I can't say that I blame her. We aren't as close as we once were but she has always been my one loyal friend and I think that I've taken advantage of that.

    Many nights I've called her in the late hours seeking her help. Sometimes my cousin, Tori, would leave me behind or I couldn't find her so I'd call Sam. Unfortunately, there are even times that I didn't remember anything and Sam would have to help me try to piece the puzzle together the next day, if she could. She's been better to me than I truly deserve.

Me
Your kind of hang out, normal boring high school fun. Tori is history.

Sam
I'm glad to hear that. Welcome to the lame side. It's Ruby's birthday on Monday so her parents are throwing her a birthday party. Are you down to come with?

    Ruby Chapman. She was my brother's girlfriend at the time he passed away. They started dating at the end of middle school. I think they had been going out for like 6 months or so. However, she felt the need to say hurtful things to my mom at the funeral.

    I don't quite remember much of what she said, I was so disconnected with the world around me at the time. Actually, Mateo was the one who stopped her and escorted her out, if my memory serves me correctly. She didn't stop there, she proceeded to harass me in the hallways at school after. She said that she needed to share something with me but she wouldn't agree to apologize for her behavior at the funeral so I refused to hear her out. Then she suddenly just stopped insisting. We haven't spoken since.

I'm not sure how she'd feel if I showed up at her party. But I'm also more curious than ever to know what information she felt was so important to share and why she behaved the way she did. I'm ready to face the truth. I feel my anxiety building.