The Way I Am

14. The One With Bender's Thoughts

Even though Mara wasn't showing it, she was upset. She wanted to continue with the Saturday detention, without letting John Bender know about her feelings.

Claire, Bender, Brian and Mara sat in a circle, laughing hysterically. Claire and Brian were getting high for the first time, while Bender sat, smiling at their silliness. Mara smoked a few hits, but like Bender, she was taking things in a relaxed manner. Bender glanced at her from time to time, being ignored by her.

It was obvious that Bender was concern about Mara's mood, because he didn't want to screw things over with her. Even though he didn't admit anything, Mara was the only girl that made him feel something more than hatred and hostility.

He didn't realize it sooner, but something deep inside was changing him, and he felt it every time he shared words and gestures with the rebel girl.

He didn't do anything. Claire pushed and kicked him, while he was hiding under the table. He only wanted to get her legs away from him, but it was reasonable why Mara thought otherwise.

Bender has always been a player, criminal and a pothead, and his reputation narrowed down everything that he had to say and do as a lie, regardless of the honest outcome.

As Claire spoke about how popular she was, Bender scooted closer to Mara, making her look at him in confusion.

"Hey, can we talk for a minute?" he whispered, grabbing her right hand in his. At that point, Claire and Brian were caught in a deep high conversation, not caring about anything that happened in their surroundings.

"What's there to talk about? I don't have anything to say," she responded, removing her hand from his.

"Nothing happened, rebel girl. Please, I need you to believe me."

"I don't know what you are talking about," she stated, folding her arms in front of her chest. She decided that the tiles on the floor were more interesting than Bender's brown orbs.

Bender grabbed her chin lightly and made her look at him.

"You know exactly what I am talking about, Mara," he replied, caressing her chin with his fingers. She hated that he made her feel that way. She liked him too much, and couldn't deny that deep inside, she believed him.

Knowing his reputation made her hesitant on what he was saying, until he spoke again.

"The truth is that I like you a lot, Mara. You are not like the girls I am used to hanging with. You are more than that, and I feel like I need you to believe me. I don't want to let you down, and I need you to please believe me," he confessed, making her open her eyes a little wider while her heart raced in an abnormal rhythm.

For John Bender to say something like that was not an accustomed thing to do. He was known to be a player, who only used women to have a good time. He had never said anything remotely nice to girls, letting them know how he truly felt, until Mara.

Mara didn't respond right away. She sat next to Bender thinking about the whole situation. When she was about to say something, Andy emerged from a smoky room, grabbing the rest of the students' attention.

As Andy danced, while taking another puff, everyone in the library applauded him.

He went back to the room and screamed, making the windows shattered instantly.

The students laughed, shaking their head at his actions.

Mara sure had a lot to think. Could she believe him? Could she give him a chance? He confessed to her how he felt, was she supposed to do the same? She didn't know what to do or think at that moment, so she opted to not speak about it, until she was ready.

She nodded her head and gave Bender a small wink, letting him know that for now, they were alright. He nodded his head and gave her a genuine smile. Both rebels continued to smoke, watching the popular kids and Brian make fool of themselves as they waited for their next moment that was supposed to unfold.