-Carolina's p.o.v-
"Listen, I didn't want things to end up like this." I looked at Mesut who was sitting across from me. We were seated across another in his kitchen, each with a plate of cold pasta and soda facing us. But neither of us dare touching our food.
"Then why did you do it?" Mesut asked.
"Because I just wanted to end it all with him." I bit my lip. "I needed to be with him one last time before I finally give myself all to you. Please just see it how I see it, I didn't want anything to come between us anymore and I needed to end it with Angel, even if It meant staying over the night and just talking to him."
"But you cheated on me." He shook his head. "How can I ever trust you again"
"It's never going to happen ever again. I'm sorry ok but I needed it." I balled my hands into a fist. "Don't you understand that it's always been you? I kinky want you nobody else. I don't care if it takes a million years to earn your trust again I'll do anything."
"It's just hard every time I think of you I think of how you went to him instead of me." He looked down at his hands. "And he had you."
I've lost sleep thinking of the time I was finally going to face Mesut and I've been correct at how tough it would be. I didn't want nothing more than to just die right then and there. Only he can manage to break my heart by saying such a few amount of words and make me regret my existence.
"I'm such an idiot, I know" I swallowed a bit of saliva. "But I had to do what I thought had to be done."
We sat there for a moment in silence just staring at eachother. I still couldn't believe I was sitting here across the table from him and him not even yelling at me because quit frankly, I deserved to be yelled at, said harsh things to.
"It doesn't matter now" he shrugged. "You've clearly moved on. "
"Are you stupid? Or are you dumb?" I asked him. "I just said I only want you, I've clearly haven't move on"
"Then who was that guy?"
"What guy" - Paul ? No I don't like him at all, I love you Mesut dammit" he was going to drive me crazy at how much I have to express my feelings for this guy and I rarely express my feelings for people.
Just then Rocky and Balboa ran into the room, snuggling against my legs. "I can't believe you kept me away from them, you know I have visiting rights" I picked up Balboa setting her on my lap.
"he's got so big" he said.
"I know, I must of missed so much" I scratched Balboas head.
"You have, I also call him Al Capone" he grinned to himself, the first smile I've seen all day and it absolutely made my stomach go beyond crazy. I wanted nothing more to hug him. I've missed him so much.
"so why'd you change to Arsenal and move up to London?" I finally asked him question I've been wondering since I found out he played for Arsenal.
"I just didn't live up to the expectations, Carlo Ancelotti had for me" he shrugged. "It's okay cause I'm perfectly fine in London now."
I couldn't hold back smile. "Well if you ask me, Jose Mourinho was a better coach because he saw the great talent you had unlike Carlo."
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I awoke the next morning in the unfamiliar bed. I had spent the night over at Mesut's. We decided to try and forgive and forget on the past and we were moving slowly trying to get back on track with our relationship. We wanted things to go slow and fall in place by itself. It was fate that we were here in London together and fate must have more plans for us.
I didn't want to move from the position I was in at the moment. My face was laid ontop of Mesut's chest as we snuggled, well I did more of the snuggling while he continued sleeping.
The alarm clock next to the bed suddenly went off and just like that our snuggling session was over as Mesut bolted up from the bed leaving me down.
"I've got to get to practice." He got up running towards the bedroom. I laid back down pulling the sheet over my bed as I spread my body across the beds taking in as much space as I can.
"Aw do you really have to go?" I asked. I wanted to spend every freaking second with him, now that he was back into my life. I didn't dare want to leave his side at all.
"Yeah. I really have to go" he said as I heard the shower turn on. "You wanna join me?"
"Why not" I jumped out of his bed. I walked into his bathroom and I took off whatever clothes I had on and threw them to the side as I entered the shower. Here I was naked infront of him who was also naked. So much for taking things slow.
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I'm so tired right now and thanksgiving is coming up yay 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸💞🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 And I might not be writing or updating things for about a week cause I'll be in California.
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