Untreated Scars ||. JJK✅

01.Dance Test

Atychiphobia
(n.) The fear of failure; fear of not being good enough

Walking down the street, holding the strap of bag so tightly like her life depended on it. Soft freckles of cotton would fall on her every here and now. Her foot steps came to a halt as her surroundings blurred out and her focus lied at the big board of the building.

"Busan Arts High School"

Plugging her earphones in, slowly the hustle around her died down as the music calmed her inner soul.

"The moment I face myself brought lowest It so happens that I'm flying the highest...

The moment I'm flying high as I wished My shadow grows in that blasting stark light..."

Everyone stared at her hoping to see her face as she made her way through the hallways of school. Her hood covered till her eyes, where as her head hung low. Hands resting in her hood pockets, she directly walked to her dance class.

Standing in front of it, taking a deep breathe before entering in. Hoping to succeed in her dance test.

She was taking ballet dance classes. She believed dance is a therapy. That Is the best way of communication.... Far more than words.

Dance is not just doing some random moves, it's the mixture of your body and soul interaction. The better they both communicate, the more beautifully your message is conveyed to its lovers.

Taking off her jacket and removing her mask finally she revealed her face to her class fellows. She keeps a mask on even at time of practice but the only time she is forced to take it off is when she have to give her test.

Your emotions, your body movements and your soul soul that can be felt by its viewers. One by one she saw how students came to middle and gave their test. How gracefully they done their job. She wondered...... She wondered if she could be ever as good as them.

"Park YN"
The moment her name was called, her inside threatened to mess up, her heart beat warned to rose up and her mind decided to play a bit with her emotions but she denied them all taking a deep breathe and emptying her mind. Walking towards the middle of the dance class that felt like an oasis to her but it was oozing with sadness.

Close your eyes, shhh....Hear it, yes your heart thumping against your chest. The air swelling around her small figure. Her surroundings were a complete silence. Each second passing by was threatening her inside. The more it took time for the music to play the more her internally messed up form tempted to took over her. But it all died down, when the ethereal sound of the music could be heard and she took her first step.

Opening her eyes that contained an ocean of emotion yet so blank. She went on her tip toes with her legs high. Her slender frame that swirled and twirled all over the dance floor. Her hands that moved as quick as lightening while her footsteps that felt lighter than the feather.

Her mind that perfectly harmonized with her soul and her body singing it's own melody. She went on with her movements unless her foot slipped and she fell dangerously on her knees while her face came colliding with the floor.

The whole room went "ooo~" unless one of the students stood up glaring at them and instantly ran to help her up. It hurt her too much for her to unable moving for some seconds. He picked her up and took her to one corner making her sit on the soft seat unknown of what's going inside her. He freaked out seeing the change of color her body went through looking like a pale ghost.

Jungkook : " hey are you alright? It's okay you can try again hmm"

Running to grab a bottle of water from his bag, his foot steps came to a halt when he turned back to the girl but saw an empty spot. Looking around at the students they seemed to be staring at him weirdly. No one interacts with her.... She is merely used for bullying and endless humiliation but never say a word. Where as Jungkook was one of the most popular student of school more probably cause of his looks and talented soul.

Lisa : " c'mon what's wrong with you oppa? Let her be..."

Jungkook : " can you just keep it shut."

Rolling his eyes, he walked out of class knowing where he always finds her.

Rooftop;..... That's a restricted area. No one goes there but because no one ever thought anyone would be in restricted area they never knew a girl who sits there and tells her story to the empty sky above her.

Reaching the rooftop, he watched her from a distance..... like always. He would always watch her without her even knowing. He would never go to her. It's not like he don't want to like others, it's just he could never muster up the courage to go to her. In his eyes, she was not an ordinary person. She was a whole book of mystery with its blurred out title. A book he wanted to explore, a book he wanted to remember till his last memory cell lived.

Useless, pitiful, pathetic.... Yess that's what you are. I wonder why you are even alive. You have one job in this whole world and you can't do it perfectly. Why do you have to mess up at the last moment always. How graceful others move..... You can never be like them..... Never.

A Lil thing would mess up and she would degrade herself to the extent sometimes she wanted to jump right off of this building where she was sitting. She never had a will to live but the only purpose she was striving to live was her passion for Dance. But when things would mess up she will start losing her will to breathe.

*****

1:00 am

Sitting in front of his window, his head tilted looking at the girl in her studio constantly practicing without a single break for last 6 hours. It was his friend's apartment and his family wondered how suddenly from last some months he would prefer staying at taehyung's apartment more than his own home. He could clearly see YN's studio from here as she would always keep her window uncovered unknown of the strange person stalking her day and night.

"what are you actually?...."

How he knew her daily routine, how he was so close to her yet so far. How he was the only one to see her tears at night and how perfectly he knew when she sleeps at usual time and when she sleeps when even one of her step messes up. How badly he wanted to tell her that no dance ever excites him as much as her does. He wanted to hug her and take all her pain away. She was the best in his eyes and not only him. It was true that her dancing was on another level but she always degrades herself.

Whenever she would mess her, at that moment he could see her life escaping her beautiful eyes, even when she was not dead.Her own insecurities killed her internally and how desperately he wanted to fix them.

"I'm here" a Whisper escaped his lips.
"you talk to me or not. I am always here"

The night followed by silent cries of her feet that kept on moving along her body and his helpless soul that couldn't do anything else but to stare at her killing herself slowly.

*****