I woke up with a sudden urge to talk to her.
See her face smile ear-to-ear, her beautiful poised figure, her wit and flushed face she displayed often.. I see her smile the most, behind my eyelids when I close them to fall asleep, when I catch her in the corner of my eye, and most definitely in my dreams. Her beauty wasn't fake, or enhanced. She was beautiful without even trying.
Why was I so obsessed? It was unnatural.
Rolling over to check the time, my heart stopped when I realized it was 9 PM. She'd normally be up, either talking to Maddie or researching diligently. Now was a pretty good time. If not, then God knows how awkward it'd be if I walked in on some petty girl problem.
I slid out of the cheap motel bed and threw on my jean jacket, as well as my worn out shoes. I even looked in the mirror to gussy up for, oh I don't know, about 5 seconds before realizing what I was doing.
Do I have..feelings for her?
I shook my head, as if wiping that thought from my mind completely and reached for the door handle when I heard a voice ask me "Where are you going?"
I turned to see my brother sitting up in his bed, rubbing the side of his sweat-covered face while looking at me. Another nightmare, I suppose.
"Checking up on the case - seeing if it's..you know..made progress. So far I've got nothing."
Sam frowned. "We just established that it was a Wendigo."
I opened the door and slipped through it halfway, and responded curtly "Right."
And with that, I shut the door and went to see her.
For some stupid reason, it took me about 30 seconds to get up the friggin' courage to walk in casually. Love is weird, I decided, and with that I swung open the door in a natural way. Maddie was on her laptop, researching like usual considering the fact that she's a try hard. I scanned the room and felt my stomach flip-flop when I caught sight of her silky, shiny curly black hair, neatly flowing down her back. Her face seemed..sad?
Maddie looked up, and raised an eyebrow at me. I was about to throw a smart remark about how pervy it was to look at me like that when her phone buzzed. She picked it up, looked up at me with her curious cat-like eyes, and simply walked out of the motel room. At that point, she turned her attention to me, me, who was standing awkwardly at the door.
"Amy," I managed, internally snickering at how my voice sounded; smooth but lacking confidence. How is it possible that one girl actually got me to feel self-conscious?
"Winchester?" She raised her eyebrows at me. God, how I loved it when she gave me that um-what-are-you-doing-you-idiot look. I cleared my throat casually.
"How's the Wendigo case going?" I asked nonchalantly, recoiling slightly when she stood up and walked towards me. My heart skipped. What is she doing..?
It skipped even more when I felt her arm brush my coat when she reached for the research papers that were sitting on the table behind me. Her face shone momentarily in the moonlight peeking through the curtained window, accenting her apple green eyes for only a split second. If only I could just stare at her eyes like that..
"Well, it killed a few campers up north..and just last night, it attacked in Hoboken. There's definitely a pattern- hello?! Earth to Winchester!"
I shook my head, pulling my gaze away from her figure and to her face. Amy looked a little annoyed - or, as Maddie would say, incensed, whatever that means - which made my stomach sink. It's like looking at something in a store, knowing you can't have it.
But knowing I wasn't able to hold Amy, kiss her forehead, or even hug her?
That was a mental nightmare for me.
"Mm, yeah, a pattern..we're directly south from Hoboken, right?" I made myself sound interested in the case. Well, at least interested enough that I could possibly convince her that I was.
To my relief, she nodded business-like. "We're in it's path of destruction, which is perfect, considering we have to take this stupid thing down."
I felt myself become irritated. "Yeah."
Amy slapped the papers against her thigh in exasperation. "What is with you? You're not focused." She snapped her fingers in my face. "Focus, Winchester. You can hook up with some grateful victim later."
The fact that she even thought that way about me sent a disappointed pang in my chest.
She blinked, and said in a quiet voice "Erm, Dean?"
I finally had enough.
I looked up at her, stared straight into her deep sea of green known as her eyes, and snapped "It's kinda hard to focus when you're staring at something you know you can't have."
"Um, whAT ARE YOU-"
I slammed the motel door behind me, and just stood outside in the harsh cold, watching the clouds from my mouth appear and disappear as I breathed. My heart pounded loudly, making me wonder if she could hear it through the door. Maybe she couldn't, maybe she was listening intently. I didn't care. My emotions were screwed up enough as it was. I would've just gone back into the motel room, but seeing through the window the looks on Maddie and Sam's faces was enough to tell me that I wasn't wanted. So, I just slowly walked over to my baby and leaned against her. I sighed, and patted the roof of the black impala as I wallowed in my suddenly mixed up feelings.
I straightened my back when I felt a presence behind me, and whipped around to face Amy.
"A-Amy, hey!" I was going to kill myself for sounding so stupid.
"Dean, what was that back there?" She seemed genuinely concerned. Her face read that she was..hopeful?
"Nothing," I quickly lied to her face, instantly feeling the sharp stab of guilt in my side. She took a step towards me, only slightly filling the gap between us. If only I could just-
"It sure as hell didn't seem like 'nothing'," Amy teased me, making me crack a smile at her much-needed wit. I rest both hands on her surprisingly sturdy shoulders and managed "It's fine" before turning around and fixing my gaze on a nearby tree.
Knowing Amy, she blocked my view.
"You, Winchester, are a crappy liar," She stated smugly. I shook my head and felt my smile grow wider. Simply her presence was reassuring.
I finally made the courageous move and...
