Insecurities [Shota Aizawa x Hizashi Yamada]

Chapter 9

Hizashi only read a few pages before he had to go. It was disappointing, as he had just been getting to the good parts and he wouldn't be able to read it again until Shota invited him over. Who knew how long that will take.

Instead, Hizashi went to Nemuri for advice. Unfortunately, it was actually Nemuri who came to him.

"'Zashi!" Nemuri yelped when Hizashi attempted to close the door on her when she appeared with a smug smirk on her face. "I just wanna talk!"

"Oh, of course, I thought you were going to do something else." Hizashi rolled his eyes, reluctantly letting her in.

"About Shota...."

Apparently Toshinori had spread word of Hizashi's attraction towards Shota and Nemuri's Cupid side flew off.

"Y'know, Shota's always been insecure since high school." Nemuri made herself at home, flopping down on his couch and throwing her legs on the ottoman. Hizashi raised part of his mountain eyebrows even higher at her.

"You haven't even talked to him much." He sat down on the arm of the couch.

"Anyone can tell that there's something wrong." Nemuri examined her nails, then said bluntly, "And it's partly your fault."

"It was years ago!" Hizashi exclaimed. "He can't hold a grudge that long."

"Apparently he can." Nemuri watched Hizashi huffed and crossed his arms, eyebrows furrowing. Nemuri watched him, then smirked. "Oh. You still like like him, don't you?"

"What?" Hizashi sputtered. He attempted to make it more lighthearted. "What are we, children? Using 'like like'?"

"Okay, then. You still love him?"

"I like him," Hizashi scoffed. "As a friend. Except it's a one-way thing since he's trying to kill me."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean he's trying to kill me." Hizashi displayed and motioned his arms as if that would explain it. "In a story."

"He's writing a book?"

"Yeah, he's basing the characters on real people and I guess he was inspired by our reunion and stuff. Toshinori got us together and Shota told me about the story he's working on. It was obvious that one of the characters, the antagonist, represent me. He said he wanted to write that character's death."

"Are you supposed to be telling me this?" Nemuri asked suspiciously, interested in learning what the two were up to.

Hizashi hesitated. "This conversation did not happen."

Nemuri laughed. "If you want to get your love relationship back together, you should get your life together."

"I'm trying," Hizashi groaned. "It's difficult! I've tried having another partner but it didn't go so well. I doubt I'd do well with Shota again."

"You didn't deny it was a love relationship."

"I didn't confirm it!" Hizashi punched her playfully. "This is why it's so difficult! Me and my big fat mouth and deaf ears."

"I'm sure you'll get over your awkwardness if you go over more. And hey, maybe you'll get him to fall for you again."

"He's trying to kill me," Hizashi repeated. "What do you think that says about me, loving him?"

"Absolutely normal."

"It's not! How can I possibly get him to even tolerate me again after everything?"

"Well, you're comfortable enough to talk about all this with me, so you'll be able to talk to him as well about it."

"Easier said than done."

"It's your fault you made this so difficult. You're lucky he's still writing."

"He said he was just starting. After 12 years!"

"He's just insecure after what happened in high school." Nemuri dismissed that fact easily. "He got over it."

"Why don't you talk to him about it if you're so confident about it?" Hizashi challenged. He got up, his cheeks starting to heat up from talking about Shota. "I'm sure he'll be happy to see you over me."

Nemuri rubbed her chin thoughtfully, an idea forming in her head.

"I'd rather have my own plan and it doesn't involve forcing him to accept me again." Hizashi sighed. "If anything, that's the closest we'll ever get to be."

"You confessed once with my help, you can do it again." Nemuri smirked. "If you don't tell him, I'll tell you that you told me about the story. Then you'll have absolutely no chance at all."

"That's going against what you want! This isn't helping! That's blackmailing!"

"Indeed it is."

—<•>—

As Shota tossed the feather up in the air with the stick, his nosed twitched.

Boo, who was already riled up with the annoying prey that kept flying away from her grasp, jumped and puffed up her tail when Shota sneezed.

"Someone's talking about me," Shota muttered, flicking his wrist to catch Boo's attention with the feather.