The Struggles of a Teenage Loser

Chapter 3

When I step into the cafeteria, it's like time stops. This is the first time all day that I really have the chance to get a good look at the other kids.

     Like I said before, its amazing how all the girls at this school can clone themselves. All the guys are pretty similar too, but I can already tell the pattern . A table full of girls with matching red and white miniskirts and bows atop their blonde little heads make me automatically think "Psh... Cheerleaders." They are sitting with a bunch of muscular guys in white jerseys.  "And there's the football players. Pff. They think they're so cool." I joke to myself. The kids are already jumping up and getting lunch, so I figure I should just go walk over to the lunch line and then decide where to sit. The lunch ladies all look the same, and I think to myself how comical it is to go to a school where everyone looks the same.     They are all old with hairnets and patterned aprons and they all look pretty unhappy. It is Sloppy Joe today and the bun is soggy and it looks old and the beef doesn't even really  smell like... Well, beef.

            When I step out of the line,  an old girl  from my school I recognize named Judie comes racing near me and without thinking I try to step out of the way but it's too late and instead I go crashing into her with my tray and the next thing I know the whole cafeteria is watching this preppy cheerleader girl covered in Sloppy Joe scream  at me. My face is turning red by now and all I can do is turn and look at the ground and have my hair covering up my red cheeks and pale face and all I can do is run out. I hear from behind me a "lunch monitor" yell "You can't leave!" But I don't care. I'm running full force down the hall and I seriously don't plan on stopping anytime soon. I want to look back but I can't for I fear I will slow down. I am shaking like a leaf and once I turn the corner out of the cafeteria's sight, I go down the hallway looking for a place to stay because God knows that there is no way in hell I am going back there. I hate to, but I reluctantly find a stall in the girl's bathroom and I push my knees up on the lid as I try to get my cellphone out of my pocket. I am trembling so much that I nearly drop it in the toilet. I dial my mom's number and it rings an endless amount of time before going to voicemail. I eventually give up and hang up without leaving a voice message. I feel tears well up in my eyes but I refuse them by closing my eyes tight and not opening. My hair falls in my face so people can't see my tears when I have to come out. "This can't be real. This can't be my life. This is not real. This can't be. This just has to a dream... Because this is just surreal." I kept telling myself. I am starving but I am shaking too much to eat anything. I hear someone come in and I quickly sit atop the toilet seat and hug my knees without trying to make a sound. I see their feet walking around. I wonder to myself if they are looking for me. I don't care. I am staying here. Then I realize they are not teacher's shoes. Teachers don't wear pink converse. They are Judie's shoes. I wonder if she's apologizing or wanting to punch my teeth out. Before I can do anything, she turns and leaves. I sigh a breath of relief. When lunch was nearly over, I snuck to my locker and took an apple  and some chips and headed to my last block class. I straightened out my dress nervously as I fidgeted with the belt. It was simple, a navy dress with multicolor vintage flower print and a beige belt that went across it. And then, something very, VERY tragic happened.

         Walking In, I slipped on something and when I fell I knew my dress came up. "REALLY, LIFE? REALLY?" Oh,  crap. I really hope no one saw that. Well,  it's too late because when I look up, everyone is staring in awe. There is a moment of silence, and then my class bursts out laughing. My face becomes burned with humiliation and I get really pale but my cheeks are on fire. I want to move, but I can't. I'm too scared. So I wait until my teacher, (thank God it's a woman) comes over and helps me up. I am so ashamed. I want to go home. Now.

French class drags on like time doesn't exist. By the end of the day,I am grabbing my bag and shooting out of the classroom. I can't wait to get home.  I walk home because my house is around the corner from the school.

     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    

       Once I am home, I set my bag down in defeat and exhaustion and am greeted by my  over hyped chubby beagle puppy named Bailey. I was greeted by an uncountable amount of puppy kisses and jolly tail wags. I chuckled at the mindless happiness of my dog. I find her favorite stuffed sheep toy, Dolly  and throw it into the dining room as she peels off and races for it, galloping like a moron. Since I didn't eat lunch, I immediately grab a quick bowl of ice cream from the freezer and eat the entire bowl in two minutes flat.     

   Considering I don't have much homework left, I flop down on the couch and make an effortless attempt to grab the remote. After suprisingly succeeding in extreme efforts, I start flipping through the channels. I hear my mother come home from work and I go to greet her. I hug her and ask about her day.  She looks like she got no sleep and looks tattered and partially frazzled. Her new job must be tough on her. I mean, thats why we're here.

   She got a job here, a better one. And we left Dad in the dust. Not that she cares, she divorced him a long time ago, when I was only six. It was a confusing and hard time, I remember not understanding who I will see when or even why. I remember feeling kind of at fault and guilty for my Mom and Dad splitting up. Of course now I know it really wasn't my fault like I thought it was. But that feels like so long ago. That night, my mother and I talk about our days and in a short time, I am in bed staring up at the ceiling and suddenly I am crying. I don't know why. Actually, yes I do. All the people at my new school think I'm a loser and there's nothing I can do to change that. Or maybe there is.

              ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Hey people! Sup! That was a rough chapter, ey? Poor Meredith ! Sorry if there were any typos in the last chapters. Just disregard because I had an eye exam and then my vision got all blurry and I literally couldn't see anything.(If anyone knows what that's like.) So sorry about that and you know the drill! Vote, comment, follow and all of that jazz!
    -Shannon

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~