Broken (Prinxiety)

11

 TW: Mentions of self harm and panic attacks

     Roman took Virgil's hand, leading him towards the entrance of the mind palace. Virgil was slightly afraid to see what Roman had to show him. Knowing the prince, it was probably something that included adventure or acts of bravery.

      "Where are we going," Virgil asked as they walked out of the door.

      "I'm not telling you. You'll love it, though!" 

       "If you say so..." Virgil wasn't convinced. 

       Boy was he wrong. 

       Virgil just stared numbly at the sight before him, breathtaken. 

      Roman had led him to the side of a cliff which contained a large waterfall. The droplets seemed to gleam like crystals as they fell through the air and landed in a pool below. The pool of water was deep, and was a rich blue color. 

      "I got bored one night, so I decided to make this." Roman said this nonchalantly as if it was a normal thing to do.

      "You got---Roman, this is...god, it's beautiful." Virgil was stunned. "There is no way that you created it just because you were bored." 

      Roman took a deep breath and nodded, his cheeks slightly flushed. "Okay, you caught me...I didn't make it because I was bored. I just--I wanted to make something for all of us. Patton loved it, but Logan said that it wasn't necessary and that it was a waste of my creative ability."

      Virgil felt some anger sprout as he heard this. It was obvious that the waterfall meant something to Roman, and he hated that Logan had said those things about it. 

      "Well, he's wrong." Roman looked shocked as he heard this. "It makes you happy, so it is necessary. and I can see how much it means to you, so it's not a waste either. You just gotta ignore Logan, okay?"

      Roman threw his arms around Virgil and hugged him tightly, causing the shorter male to tense up slightly. "Thank you so much, Virgil! It means a lot to hear that..." He then pulled away. "Oh, why don't we go swimming?"

      Virgil was starting to feel anxious at the thought. What if he drowned? What if there was some sort of creature? What if Roman expected him to take off his hoodie?

      With a snap of his fingers, Roman had changed into a pair of swimming trunks that had his logo scattered across it. Virgil averted his eyes, trying to avoid staring at his chest. He looked at Virgil expectantly, causing him to get a small spike of anxiety. 

      Virgil shook his head slightly. "Um...I'd rather not swim," he told him. "I don't know how!" That was a lie. "Maybe I can just watch you from up here."

      Roman gave him a reassuring smile. "Well, I can teach you! It's not that hard, and I promise that nothing bad will happen, so you don't have to start worrying about anything. I made this place safe."

      Virgil took a deep breath, trying to think of another excuse so he didn't have to take off his hoodie. He was afraid of Roman finding his cuts. He didn't know what he would do if he saw them.

      "Here--let me help you change." Roman pointed at him, and he suddenly felt the warmth of the sun hit his skin. Virgil went pale, and moved to hide his arms behind his back. 

      Unfortunately for him, Roman had caught sight of the cuts marring his skin. 

      He strode over and gently grabbed one of Virgil's arms, removing it from behind his back. Virgil's heart pounded in his chest as Roman gazed wordlessly at them, an unreadable expression on his face.

      After what felt like forever, he looked up towards Virgil and asked him a simple question. 

      "Why?"

      Virgil could feel his panic rising. He didn't know what to say. Roman was going to hate him, he was going to tell the others, they would all think he was weak--

      Virgil's breath caught in his throat, and he could tell that he was on the brink of a panic attack. Before he could truly be sent over, Roman pulled him into a gentle hug.

      "Take deep breaths, okay?" The prince's voice was soothing, and Virgil found himself doing as he said. He started focusing on doing his breathing exercises, and his panic began to recede. 

      Virgil pulled away once he felt that he had enough control over his emotions and crossed his arms over his chest. "I--I don't know how to explain this," he told Roman, his voice sounding weak. 

      "That's okay." Roman's voice was calm, which Virgil found odd. "Take your time, okay? But I need to find out why you did this. If someone is bullying you, then I can vanquish them for you!" There was the Roman that Virgil knew and l--tolerated. 

      Virgil wished it could be as easy as getting rid of Depression. But he could never truly be gone. Virgil knew that better than anyone. 

      "It--it was no one but myself." When would the lies end? "I guess after years of being considered the bad guy got to me. All those years of everyone hating me made me grow..." He couldn't bring himself to say the word. He didn't even want to think about his brother. 

      "Virgil..." Roman once again had that unreadable expression. Virgil wished he could know what it meant. 

      "It's okay though," Virgil said with a nonchalant shrug. He was shaking slightly, and silently cursed at himself for doing so. He didn't want to show anymore weakness than he already had. 

      "No it's not--"

      "Yes it is." Virgil cut him off. "I can deal with it on my own. And it's not affecting Thomas, so it doesn't matter. And besides, you guys were right for saying all of those things about me. I'm not a good person like you think I am."

      Roman shook his head. "Sure, you were...difficult when you were against us, but now you've toned it down. And I know that you want what's best for Thomas. You can't help that you see the negative, and we should accept that."

      Virgil wasn't so sure. At one point he wasn't thinking about Thomas's best interest. He just wanted to torment him.

      "Anyways, let's go properly bandage those cuts." Roman motioned towards him, and he suddenly had on his old outfit once more, which he was grateful for. Roman did the same to himself after that. 

      He gently took Virgil's hand and led him back to the mind palace.