SECRETS & LIES

OUT OF CONTROL

It was dark when they left the hospital, the moon at peak in the midnight blue sky, stars illuminated it like a thousand candles. The air was cold and the street silent, it was nearly midnight so barely anybody would be out at this time, the only noise came from the cars passing by or the nightclub which was just down the road, music blaring and people talking rather quiet loudly. Spencer, who had said nothing for the past 3 hours, stared gormlessly into the darkness. His long purple scarf draped over his shoulder, his long brown hair was slightly tangled amongst it, the black cotton coat was being taken by the wind as it waved behind him like a superhero's cape. But his hand, his fingers were entwined with Jason's; warm. Jason was still struggling to walk so was given a crutch to steady him as his wound fully heals. Wearing a black shirt with a black, silky scarf hung loosely by his collar bones, tight skinny jeans with a couple of ripped holes here and there, and a dark grey beanie flopped on his head hiding his dark brown hair. Jason despite looking dapper in a suite and tie, he always did have an alternative fashion, this was rare for an FBI agent, normally they dressed rather well, but Jason just dressed like he should be in an indie rock band. Walking hand in hand, they headed towards Derek's car which was parked in the hospitals car park, neither of them are allowed to drive so they have to be driven everywhere by one of there team mates. "You guys okay?" Asked JJ.
"Yes we're good thanks JJ" Jason looked over to Reid who was staring still into the darkness. "Spencer?" Jason gave him a slight nudge, which made him jump slightly like he was daydreaming. "Did you hear JJ?" He shook his head.
"I asked how you were" JJ repeated. Reid just nodded, and carried on staring into the dark, slightly illuminated streets. Jason just gave JJ a half smile, half saying 'we're okay' and the other half saying 'He needs help'. He gave JJ one finally hug before she got into her car, gave Reid one finally look of concern, and drove away.
"Right, you guys ready to head home?" It was Morgan, he was waiting for them by his car, which looked almost a green in the street lamp light, but it was black, as it was an FBI rental car. "Yeah, we're good. Sure you're okay with driving us home?"
"Yeah course man, how you feeling Pretty Boy?" Reid once again didn't respond. It was like he wasn't there, he wasn't with it. The drugs were still slightly in his body and it will take a while for them to fully wear off, which isn't helping him now as he is in withdrawal. Reid has already been through this a few times in the past, as he slipped back into them a few times. Jason looked at Reid with worry, because he new that this could happen again, and it could be even worse then before.

The clock stuck 4, and Reid was tossing and turning in the bed, Jason was fast asleep, but despite the fact that he has done everything to try and get off to sleep, his body just seems so awake. Giving up, Reid pulled the covers off of him and climbed out of bed. The morning sun was beginning to awake, blue, yellow like light shone through the cracks in the curtains, shinning straight into Reid's eyes, he blinked quickly, moving away from the light, like a vampire in the day. He walked over to the bathroom and opened the door, turning back to look at his sleeping lover. He looks so beautiful Spencer thought, why do I always have to mess things up. Closing the door behind him. 

Spencer stared at himself in the mirror, but he wasn't looking at his reflection, he was looking through himself, looking at what he has become, what he depends on. The thought of the needle pushing into his arm, the cold liquid of the Dauladid running through his veins was driving him insane. His whole body ached, his head was spinning and his stomach, his stomach was in agony, the feeling of being sick caused his body. His eyes began to water, sweating and burning, a shooting pain shot through him like a bullet. Spencer covered his mouth and his belly and he bent down at the toilet and throw up everything he had eaten today (even though it wasn't a lot).  He slumped down next to the loo, as he cried, tears streamed from his red eyes, shinning as they ran down his face. One hand was on his head and one over his mouth as he tried to muffle the sound of him crying, trying not to wake up Jason. He leaned against the wall as once again pain flooded his entire body. Becoming restless, and irritable, Spencer stood up, head spinning, body feeling weak, he pulled himself up onto his feet. His hands on the sink as once again he stared at himself in the mirror, but he doesn't recognised the person staring back at him. He turned on the cold tap and slashed his face with water, trying to freshen himself up, but it didn't work, he still looked a mess, still looked like....an addict. With that, in one fell swing, Spencer punched his mirror, shattering the glass into millions of tiny little pieces, blood covered his knuckles, he stared back at the now broken mirror, only one piece of glass remained, looking at him self, Spencer collapsed to the floor in tears. As he cried, not covering the sounds that escaped his mouth, the bathroom door opened, and Jason was standing in the frame.