Camp Half-Blood

We Meet the God of Crazy Doctors: Rex's POV

As if Brock's driving wasn't already bad enough, about five minutes into the drive he decided we weren't going fast enough, despite the fact that the speedometer needle hadn't gone lower than about 100 miles per hour and we hadn't seen a monster yet.  Well, unless you count the big ugly fury that we totally ran over. Brock kept cutting corners, drifting into narrow alleyways, and driving on the sidewalks.  People screamed and ran, pulling children and babies in strollers out of the way of the bus, which just kept going like a rocket-powered comet.

Finally, after about an hour or so later, we arrived at the Empire State Building.  Actually, we arrived in the Empire State Building Lobby, since Brock had driven through the side of the building, slammed on the brakes, and parked two inches away from reception desk. The bus nearly tipped over and we were flung from our seats and into the windows on the opposite side.  When the bus bounced back we were flung to the other side again.  We climbed stiff-kneed out of the back of the bus and staggered to the desk. 

The receptionist just grunted, barely even looking up from his book.  It was a big green leather book with a flower on the cover.  "What do you need?"

"Elevator to the six hundredth floor." Brock said grinning.

"There is no six hundredth floor."  The old man grumbled.

He was right.  As far as I knew there were only one hundred and two floors in the Empire State Building.

"Ahh.  But we have an appointment with Aslepius."

"Elevator on the left.  Don't let anyone see you.  Please pay for the wall."  He handed us a little key card.

After dropping some gold drachmas on the desk we went into the elevator and inserted the key card into a little slit in the conrol panel.  A little red touch-screen button appeared on the console saying '600'  I hit it and we started going up.   Some REALLY bad elevator music was playing.

"Bob Marley's Red Red Wine? Really?"  Joanna asked, making a face. "In ancient Greek?"

"This song isn't THAT bad."  Kaire answered looking at her.

"Yeah, It's not that bad if you live in the seventies." Brock said miserably rubbing his temples. "Or if you respect the original."

Finally, we were greeted by a pleasant "Ding!" as the doors opened onto a floating sidewalk.  The first thing we noticed is the palace.  It was composed of several Greek-Style buildings with a radio tower and several sattelite dishes and an array of weather forcasting equipment.  Then we noticed the people.  Nymphs and Satyrs running shops called out their wares; bright juicy fruit, Mount Olympus T-shirts that changed colors based on your mood, and jars of greek fire, a green flame that keeps going and consumes everything.  As far as I'd heard it could float on water.

Brock asked around for Asclepius and an old satyr with graying fur answered. "His office is that way and to the left."  

We followed his instructions and came to a brick building.  Except for the Greek columns and the flaming torches, which burned with blue fire, it looked like any other regular doctor's office.  We went inside and found a large room with white pristine walls.  Medical posters and magazine clippings hung on the walls and some tabloids sat in a rack next to a line of chairs.  One poster showed a cartoon goat with a thermometer in his mouth.  It read "Don't Let Sickness Get Your Goat."  I'd seen the same one in the Big House Infirmiry.  Suddenly,  a blond headed nymph in a nurse's uniform came out and announce that the doctor would see us now.  She handed us a clipboard and told us to sign in before leading us to another room in the back corner of the building.

The room was strange enough with its non-matching neon colored walls and the orange and black greek pottery jars covered in images of dying people and filled with cotton balls, swabs, and popsicle sticks.  Then we noticed the long wooden table that lined one wall.  It was littered with Mason jars full of pickled monster parts, molds and fungi,  petroleum jelly, petri dishes with unidentified furry objects bouncing around inside, a weird mix of ancient and modern medical tools, some of which looked more like weapons to me, and what appeared to be a large human brain.  I picked up a jar and looked at the black slug things swimming around.

"Are those---"  I was interupted by a voice behind me.

"Leeches?  Why of course!  Doctors used to use them for bloodletting!  I could do it to you if you like."  I spun around to look at the speaker.  

He wore black no-slip shoes with khaki shorts, stained with several substances I didn't want to even know about, and a big green sweater.  His lab coat was wrinkled and torn in a few places and was also stained. The pocket had a symbol of a staff entwined with two serpents, and his name 'Asclepius' stitched in blue thread.  But his face was the most bizzare.  His wacky white mad-scientist hair and thick beard made him look like a mix between Albert Einstein and Santa Claus.  His eyes bugged from his head behind two-inch thick glasses.

"Ummm.... "  We all took a step back.  

His nurse giggled at our reaction.  "He's not going to hurt you." 

"Of course not! Now are you here for a checkup?"  He grabbed Skye by the chin and stuck a popsicle stick in his mouth.  "Say 'AAAAH'"

"Uhh..." Skye whimpered.   

"Hmmm?  No signs of strep throat!"  That's good.  "Come here, boy!" He pointed at John.

Without waiting for an answer he grabbed John's shirt and pulled him closer.  He grabbed a massive syringe which, I kid you not, was bigger than a roll of paper towels.

"I thought you said you weren't going to hurt us?"  John said his eyes wide with terror.

"I'm not.  This will only last a minute.  Now sit still!  A little pain never hurt anyone!"  Asclepius said with a very wild look in his eye, as he held the razor sharp needle inches from John's arm.

"Stop!"  The rest of us yelled simultaneously.  I continued, "We're not here for a checkup!  We need a cure for Bram!"

"Is he suffering blood-poisoning? Scurvy? Gluttony? Heartbreak? Heart attack? The Plague? Consti---"

"No!  We're not sure!  The oracle said to ask you about fourteen elements or something!"

"Fourteen Elements?  Illness?  Has Bram been having trouble breathing, eating or sleeping?"  Asclepius asked his eyes the size of dinner plates behind his glasses.

"Yes..." Joanna answered confused.

"Oh, no!"  He gasped,  putting his hand to his brow.  "He's got Pandora's Curse!"

"You mean like the radio website Pandora?" Kaire asked confused.

"No, no Pandora from Greek mythology, my dear child." He laughed.

"Pandora's Curse?  As in Pandora's box?" John asked trying to wrench his arm away.

"Yes!  When Pandora opened the box, it unleashed many awful things including sickness.  One such sickness was later called Pandora's Curse.  It's a very serious sickness caused by the victim's fear. Depending on how fearful for their life the victim gets, it effects the seriousness of the illness.  It works only with "Quote" 'Mythological creatures!'"

"Ewww!" We all gagged.

"The fourteen elements are the ingredients you need to cure him." Asclepius said.  "I haven't used this cure in nearly a millenium or two, but I'm pretty sure these are the elements."

  He handed us a sheet of paper with some crazy crayon scribbling on it.