The Price You Will Pay

Trip to the park

So once I get home after a long afternoon of questions from Hunter . Of what day can we go? Are we gonna go? What rides can he do? I feel like I've been on a roller coaster. So on the last bus run we pick up Owen. I know what's coming the story . He will get him all excited and I will listen to them both all night. I quietly think thanks Jac n his parents just what I don't need.
So now at this point I am trying to think of how to deal with this.

I have given in and said yes we will go just let's stop talking about it. They said okay. I take a deep breath and think Lord help me. I tell them go get your stuff for tub time. I clean kitchen and think yes I would love a glass of wine. I hear them talking they are happy. I think what would a quick sip hurt. They are not in kitchen I find the wine and think yes. I find a glass if course not a wine glass. I pour just a little. I put the wine away, hold cup in my hand just as I am about to take a sip. I hear Mom what are you doing it's bath time. I say screw it I guzzle it. I place the cup in the dishwasher and smile.

I go to bathroom start running bath. The boys come in hands full of toys. I shake my head and say guys what room will there be for you? We all laugh. They choose the most important toys. And into the tub they go. I smile to my self thinking theses are the moments I know I got this survival mode.

Finally time for bed. They jump into bed all silly. They are all excited about the adventure they will have at the amusement park. I think of all the shit I'm not ready to deal with . His parents are going and his nephews? Too much to process.

Of course the rest of the week is flying bye. I know I gotta go gym tomorrow and he will be there. I guess I will have to commit to time and stuff. I was surprised he didn't call yet.

So after our morning bus run I know we are going to the gym. Og course Hunter is all excited he can't wait for me to tell Jac that we are going. I on the other hand are still not ready to do it but am. As we approach the gym to park the car I see Jac truck. As we are walking to the gym Hunter is pumped. I take a deep breath and go in. I have only a few minuets till I start my class. I bring Hiunter to day care. He is looking all over the place for Jac. I laugh to myself.

I get to class with out running into him. Im relived. The class flys by it seems. I get to baby sit now. So once I round the corner to day care room, I see Jac standing in door talking to Hunter. I think oh dear Lord what has that child told him? The see me and Jac has a big smile on his face. think well at least I don't have to tell him we are going. He says hello to me. I ask Hunter what have you told him? He is all happy . Jac turn to me and says only all your deepest secrets. I laugh but I think oh God what have I done?

So now we have chosen we are going this weekend because I have the boys. I think that only give me 2 days. I know the boys are going to drive me crazy about it. Jac says ill pick you guys up on Saturday morning like 8am. I tell him thank you. He says remember Crystal this day is on me dont you stress about money at all. Just go have some fun. He tells me the kids are gonna love meeting his nephews . I think oh I'm sure they will. Im more worried I get a day with his parents too. And I do not even know him well yet. Then I realize hay it keeps us from being alone thank God.

Friday was a long day but it is finally over. Tomorrow is the trip. I get the boys in the apartment and we need to pack some stuff. I tell them go pick out your bathing suits, you also need a sweatshirt and a dry change of clothes. I get them there towels and a bag. I now have to figure out what am I going to wear? No way am I wearing a bathing suit. But I have to bring one. We all get our stuff together. I am nervous.

I tell the boys play while I go figure out what we are having for dinner. I get in the kitchen and I am looking at what we have. I think I guess Mac and cheese. I hear someone knocking at the door. I did not invite anyone over. Must be a kid to play with the boys. I goto the door. I open it and it is Jac. He has 2 pizza boxes and a bag of stuff. I look at him. He says hay I just wanted to drop off dinner for you guys. Then I hear the boys coming. They see the pizza and are like oh yeah man pizza. Im still standing there I dont know what to say. He says im. to looking to come in, I am just dropping it off. The boys are asking what's in the bag? He says you will have to see. They are jumping around all silly. I am still kinda shocked I dont know what to say. He hands me the pizza and gives Owen the bag. He says good night boys see you in the morning. He says good bye and turns to walk away. I still have not said anything. I feel bad I said hay Jac thank you that's very nice of you. But you didn't have to. Tomorrow is a big treat. He says hay if I want to do something nice for a friend I can. IU said thank you again. He says hay there is a surprise in the bag for you. See you tomorrow and walks away.