[HIATUS] Rainbow Tears (Sting x Rogue Fanfic)

Chapter 17: Empty Logs

Cold air rushed through my lungs and burst from my throat equally as fast. Joints popped and creaked from the sudden gesture and rippled with one giant shudder from my fingertips to my ears and down to my toes. A dull pain lingered in my shoulder blades as I stretched with a small groan. My heart was still pounding from the strange dream. I gripped the sheets and felt relieved even so as I held my father's hands for a moment. My heartbeat fell into sync with the heart monitor which continued its beeping without a care. I looked around and gasped when I landed on a small wall clock. It was nearly midnight now. I had overstayed much too late. Yukino would be cross knowing I had stayed out for so long and would have to head back in complete darkness albeit for a few select streetlamps if they still worked. It was a wonder why she didn't wake me up before.

I clinked down corridor with my shoes clicking softly on the wooden tile. I suddenly heard a gasp as I reached the foyer. Yukino, although drowsy, sustained a state of shock as she saw me.

"Oh my gosh, you're still here?" she asked with a hint of worry. "I thought you had left earlier. Oh dear, I nearly locked you in!"

"It's okay. I fell asleep in my father's room. Nothing was of your accordance," I said. "Think nothing of it."

"Oh, but it's so late now. Why don't you stay here anyway since you're still here. I can get some extra pillows and blankets for you," she urged, but I shook my head.

"There's no need. I'd hate to intrude on you. I know the way back like the back of my hand," I explained. "Don't worry too much. Good night!" I slipped out the door before she could say another word. For if I had lingered longer, I would have accepted no doubt. But, I couldn't stay there with the threads of the dream still dancing in my head. I needed fresh air to think it all over. Perhaps, maybe I had been doing too much thinking. But, it is what it is I suppose.

I wandered around walking through alleyways and absentmindedly passed by the dimly lit streets. I could still feel the strange shadow still staring at me. I trembled at the thought it became my father. To think, I walked into that trap so easily. I was a fool to believe my father would be okay.

Somewhere deep down, I really don't know if he'll make it.

Apart of me wishes he was dead. It's a horrible thought, but would things be less worrisome. After all he's kept and left behind, I shouldn't care. The fact is: I don't want to care. But, I do. Even so, I can't let go yet.

The other part of me wants him to live and come back. But, he's been suffering for so long. He's still breathing, but his body feels so cold now. Sure, there's still a bit of life, but how much longer can he last? How much better is he really? Even now if he were to wake up, he would never be as well as before.

I feel like I'm staring at him through a telescope. He was once a star so close that now feels like a distant twinkle in the shores of space. His light isn't as bright now. I can see him disappearing completely and reappearing on another night, but while I watch through this telescope, I'm scared.

One day, the star will disappear from the sky and he will never come back.

I wonder what the shadow meant. 'There's only us' is what it said. I think it knows more than I do. But, I'm not ready for the end. Us needs to be father and me. Us can't be just me.

I don't want to be alone anymore.

I found myself running from asphalt into concrete and then solid ground. I realized I had made my way down to the lake where Sting and I once worked on the project. Something felt good when I looked down the empty trail.

It was a serene quiet just the chill of the night whispering around me and making the rigid trees shake with vigor. I took one step after the other again and again until I was streamlining for the lake.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:
I often find myself looking at the sky if it's not raining for cloudy out. Stars are like people. They change, they dim, they brighten, and they die out. Yet, they're so endless that it's hard to see if that one star is the same one you saw before. How do you know it's even a star? People will change and sometimes, it's inevitable for change to rip away our most precious ones. The people we love, the ones we care for, the individuals who mattered: they all come and go just as we have to move on.

Any thoughts on whether Rogue can, too?