Smile Innocently Lie Easily

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

They had barely three days to get Jeremy ready for his date with Lisa. On the second day his mom found out about it and offered her assistance. “Sweetie it’s alright to be nervous, it’s even endearing but you don’t want to be a fidgeting mess and scare her off.” Mrs. Hansen offered as the three of them sat around the kitchen table they were pretending would be the table he sat at with Lisa during their dinner date. “Just be yourself.”

“That’s what I keep saying.” Rachel piped up.

“Being myself hasn’t helped me so far.” His shoulders sank.

Rachel hated to see him beat himself up when it wasn’t even warranted. “It was you who asked her out, remember? Don’t expect the worse because then that’s what’ll happen. Be the guy you are with me; smart, funny and a lot more carefree than you usually are. She’ll love that guy.” At that Mrs. Hansen gave her a look she didn’t understand.

Jeremy was tired of thinking and discussing the date. “We have homework to do. I’ll be right back.” He disappeared upstairs to grab their backpacks. They had been in his room first before Mrs. Hansen suggested they use the kitchen.

After he was gone Rachel noticed his mom was still watching her. “Am I missing something?”

She shook her head and used the same nervous smile Jeremy did. “No, I just realized something. I’m going to get started on dinner, will you be staying?”

Rachel figured whatever she realized had to do with dinner and dropped the whole subject. “You don’t even have to ask anymore Mrs. H. I’ll take whatever you serve up rather than the frozen dinners back home. I’ll get out of your hair and wait for Jeremy in the living room.”

She sat on the couch and tried to come up with another idea to help Jeremy loosen up. The first date was the most important, it’d be Lisa’s first time seeing him outside of school and the reputation he had there.

Rachel really wanted him to have a good time, he deserved it. She wanted desperately to do one good thing for him.

“You look deep in thought, should I be nervous?” Jeremy sat down next to her and began putting their books on the table in front of them.

“Ha-ha, real funny. When you sweep Lisa off her feet and live happily every after we’ll see how you’re joking at my awesomeness then.” She cracked a smile and ignored how that visual rubbed her the wrong way. She was going to have to get over her dislike for Lisa in order to support Jeremy but at the moment she didn’t know how. That girl really annoyed her.

They immersed themselves in homework and dropped the subject of Lisa and the date until tomorrow. As they finished their work it was time for dinner. Rachel sat around the table and enjoyed watching the family interact. After this she was going to have to go home and face her own family dynamic, if it could be called that.  Her mother had been angry to learn she sunk out but after making some comments about how Rachel was a disappointment and expressing her dislike she dropped it.

Jeremy nudged her shoulder. “You’re not eating. Are you alright?” his concern was written all over his face.

She offered a smile that felt forced and out of placed. “Yeah.”

“I thought we don’t lie to each other.”

It was that easy for the wave of guilt to crash into her. She started into his blue eyes and caved. “I don’t want to go home.” she softly admitted as his parents focused on each other and ignored them for the time being.

She caught a glimpse of remorse in his eyes before he leaned in close and she lost sight of them. “You can stay again.”

Rachel nodded yes then turned her attention to her food in dug in. It was too good to go to waste.

After dinner while his mother cleaned up they discussed the plan. They’d say goodbye and she’d leave like every other day but this time she’d double back in about ten minutes and he’d have the window open for her.

The plan went without a hitch.

“One of these days we’re going to get caught.” Jeremy expressed his fear showing as he spoke in a whisper she could barely hear.

“Don’t be such a downer. This was your idea.” She hid her bag underneath the bed before sitting on top of it. “It’s ok I know you only did it because you feel sorry for me.”

“No it’s not that.” He sat next to her. “I just wanted….you to feel safe.”

She cursed the stupid emotion that took a hold of her throat. “What makes you think I don’t feel safe at home?” the last they discussed her personal life she explained she didn’t want to be there because it could be awkward when her mother had company.

“I don’t know, it was just a feeling.”

“Well you’re wrong.” She ignored the new wave of guilt as she lied to her best friend for the first time. “Follow your routine as if I wasn’t here before your parents get curious.”

“Yeah I have to go get in the shower.”

“Go. I’ll hide in the closet until it’s time for lights out.”

She sat there in the dark and again cursed the damn emotions swimming in her chest. So what if her mom’s latest boyfriend was looking at her funny? It wasn’t enough for all of this. It wasn’t enough to burden Jeremy with. One of these days her mom would grow tired of him like all the others and she’d never see him again. It was pointless to be scared of the creep. Rachel convinced herself of all of that by the time Jeremy was done with his shower.

Like the last time she stayed with him, they lay side by side and tried to fall asleep. Rachel knew he was probably worried about his parents finding out and what would come next if they did. She knew she could handle anything dished out as long as they didn’t ask her to stay away. She couldn’t lose Jeremy.

It was going to be a month soon that they were friends but if felt like a lifetime, she couldn’t remember her life without him and how quickly he filled the emptiness in her heart.

Suddenly he was on his side looking down at her. “Are you ok?” he whispered.

“Why?”

“You’re crying.”

She touched her hand to her cheek and sure enough it was wet. “It’s nothing. I’m just having a mental day.”

“Rach….” He reached down and took a hold of her hand.

The comfort he offered was enough to open the floodgates she tried to hard to keep back. She closed her eyes as the tears fell free. “I was thinking you’re all I have. Why can’t she love me?” there was no mistaking who she meant.

“She does, she just doesn’t show it like other moms.”

“That’s what you want to believe and I wish it was true. I gave up trying to change it and it’d be a lot easier to handle if I never had to go back there. Don’t worry about it, like I said I’m just having a mental moment and soon it’ll be over and forgotten.” She explained with a hint of desperation to drop the subject.

Jeremy nodded and laid back down on his side. “It’ll get better, I promise.” He never let go of her hand.