Unbroken

Chapter 9: I Hear the Beat of My Heart Getting Louder

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

Ah, hell. There's that fucking beeping noise again. Well, I guess we all know what that means! Yep, I'm back in the hospital. I don't understand why they brought me back. It's really not necessary. I fell, so what? I didn't talk, so what?

Maybe I just didn't want to talk to anybody. Why would I? I have no reason to. I have nothing to say. And, even if I did, who in God's name would I want to say them to? Whatever.

Okay, maybe I'm being a bit unreasonable, but hey. Can you blame me?

Beep.

Ugh. That damn heart monitor is really agitating me. Why is it necessary? Is there a chance that my heart would stop beating? And, if there is, who cares if I die. I have nothing to live for anymore. Carly is just about fed up with me, my parents don't know what to do, Olivia is giving me the cold shoulder, and Logan and Luke have each other to keep company. Plus, Dani and the boys are gone, so who would really care? No one. That's who.

My mind was slowly, but surely, slipping back into consciousness. I had a dull numbness all over my body. I could feel the cool metal of the bars clamping my limbs to the hospital bed. They probably thought I was going to have another meltdown when I woke up. Well, sorry to disappoint.

The sheets were itchy and annoying. You think with all the taxes people pay, they could afford some decent sheets. But, no! The state spent it all on football. I'm sorry, this is no time to be political. My mind has been a little whacked up lately, please forgive me.

I started hearing voices again, just like last time. I could only hear muffled noises, though. Nothing I could make out or recognize. Then, the light hit me. It was blinding and cloudy. My eyelids wern't very heavy, but it was still a struggle to open them. I only opened them a crack so as to see what was going on before anyone noticed me.

Olivia was sitting in a chair and sketching, per usual. Luke and Logan were passed out on the chairs next to her; they looked so angelic when they slept. Mom and Dad were speaking with a doctor, so that couldn't mean anything good. Maybe they're talking about -

"Luce?" My thoughts were disrupted by Olivia's soft voice. I turned to see she had stopped sketching and was gaping at me. "Luce are you awake?"

I was too drained to speak, so I simply nodded my head in agreement. She gently lifted Luke's head off her shoulder and laid it down on the seat, so as to not wake him. She tip-toed over to the chair next to the bed and plopped down. "Hi." She gave me one of those stupid-ass sympathetic smiles.

"Hi? You've been giving me the cold shoulder ever since the accident; and now that you've finally spoken to me, all you can say it 'hi?'"

Her face was a mixture of flabbergasted and guilty. She picked at her nails and mumbled, "I guess... "

"You guess?" I don't know why I got so angry, my emotions were just on edge. "You guessed that at the time I needed my family, my SISTER, the most, you guessed it would be better to completely shut me out? Huh?!"

She lifted her head back up to me, her eyes glistening with tears. "I'm s-sorry. I d-didn't mean to do that. I just... "

"You just what?!" She stifled a sob, and I instantly regretted yelling and overreacting. I wanted to hold her and comfort her, but the hospital decided they didn't want that. They wanted my limbs clamped down to a hospital bed. "I'm sorry, Liv. I didn't mean to yell. My emotions have been kind of all over the place, lately. I don't know what came over me." She attempted a smile, but it wasn't very powerful. I adjusted my hips over as far as they could. "Come lay with me."

She stood up without a word and steadily laid next to me and tucked her head in the crook of my shoulder. She snuggled into me and cried. I wanted to do the same, but I didn't think it would help the situation.

"I did it because I was mad at you." Olivia's voice was barely more than a whisper and cracked due to the tears. I decided not to respond and just let her continue. "A couple months ago, I applied to an amazing fashion school in New York. I thought that maybe if I got a scholarship and Dad got that promotion he was up for, I would be able to go. Then, about a week before the accident, I got a reply. I made it in."

"That's fantastic! Why didn't you tell - "

"I'm not finished." Her eyes never met mine, they stayed buried in my shoulder. "I got a scholarship. It was almost full. Then, Dad got that big promotion, and there was enough money for me to go. I finally did it! I was finally going to be able to live my dream! But, then the next day we were all on a flight to London to see you." I knew where this was going, and I did not like it at all. Liv started full out sobbing into me.

"I know it wasn't your fault, but the med bills were so much that they couldn't afford to send me to the school. I had to decline. I had to give up on my dream! It was the most awful thing I've ever had to do!" She stopped talking to wail for a few minutes. I just smoothed circles with my thumb on her shoulder, because I knew that was the way to calm her down. Once she stopped blubbering enough to speak, she continued.

"I was just sad for a few days, then I got over it. I wasn't mad anymore, and I just wanted to help you. Because, I knew that your dream had been robbed of you too. But, then you got all depressed. You never ate, never talked, your face was expressionless, y-you kept repeating how your life was over, and that you had nothing to live for, and you just SAT there wasting your DAMN LIFE while I COULD BE LIVING MINE!" She was now standing, towering over me and screeching.

I stood there.

Frozen.

I honestly didn't know what to say. "I didn't know you felt that way."

"Yeah, well, it's not like anyone paid any attention to anyone else but you!" She huffed and puffed heavily, her chest rising and falling swiftly. I gaped at her, unable to process everything. We stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity, and then she huffed and threw her hands in the air. "Of course!" She slapped her hands on her thighs and stormed out of my room.

Then, it was quiet. I could hear everything. Luke was snoring softly, and Logan was mumbling in his sleep. A phone just rang at the desk outside; a women answered it. Someone's shoes were squeaking all the way down the hall. The sound grew louder as the man came closer to my door; then, it faded away. The faucet in my bathroom had a drip.

Drip.

Drop.

Drip. Drip.

Drop.

Then, I could hear my own heart beat. No, not with the monitor, but with my ears. It was slow, almost dead. But then, it perked up. I became more steady, more demanding. I heard the beat of my heart getting louder. The beat rose faster and faster, like it was excited. Then, it was packing. Full on, healthy heartbeat.

Then, it dawned on me.

My mom chose the perfect time to step back into my room. "Hi, boobaloo. How are you feeling?"

I paused for a second. "Mom... If I wanted to do something that was absolutely crazy, would you support me one hundred percent?"

(A/N HELLO MY LOVELIES! How are you all? Good? Good. So, I updated. I know, I know, it's been ages. But, hey, I'm sorry. School is my priority. I have tennis practice until five everyday, then homework. So, updates are probably going to be limited to weekends only. I'm sorry, that's really all I have time for. Alright, hope you enjoyed this chapter at least, STAY BEAUTIFUL MY LOVELIES! ~Killian)