Reflection

Confidence

Jesse's eyes slowly fluttered open and instantly she perked up a bit, but settled down when she noticed that she was in her room. Jesse groggily brought her freezing hand up to her face and rubbed her glimmering cinnamon colored eyes.

She slowly sat up, her soft, azure, silky sheets falling down on her lap. She stretched her fairly long arms and pondered thoughtfully.

She didn't remember falling asleep or how she even got there, surprisingly. She wouldn't be very surprised if she passed out from exhaustion or something.

Everything in her now slowly processing mind was foggy, but what she did vaguely remember was Lukas telling her to come on.

Jesse let out a big yawn, slowly putting her arm over her mouth, her warm breath brushing against her soft skin.

It wasn't long before she swung her legs over her bed and swung open her swaying azure curtains.

The cool wind blew in her face and gently ruffled her clothing. The beaming crescent shaped moon lit up her face and she gazed painfully at the twinkling stars shining in the peaceful night.

Jesse's head bobbed as she suddenly threw a fit of several raspy coughs.

She quickly coughed into her elbow and her eyebrow slowly lifted when she felt something wet come in contact with her arm. She worriedly gazed at the small amount of fresh crimson blood on her elbow, her umber eyes widening.

"I'm getting worse," She mumbled to herself, already beginning to wonder if she should confide in Lukas already. "It'd probably be dumb to keep something like this away from him," Jesse thought to herself, but even though she knew she should tell him something held her back.

How would he react? Would he push her away?

She bleary gazed at the radiant moon, uncertainty gleaming in her cocoa colored eyes.

It'd only worry him....

No one needs to know....

It's not that big of a deal...

It's under control....

The voice grew louder and louder with each word, making Jesse feel like someone was screaming right in her ear. Jesse covered her ears with her cold hands, wanting the voice to leave her alone. Before she knew it the voice reduced to a whisper and she could actually hear the whistling of the gentle breeze again.

She placed her hands on the cold window sill as she felt the world tilt and sway. Will I see you guys again?

This question pretty much haunted Jesse and made her blood run cold. The dreadful feeling of never seeing the rest of her friends again made her heart sink even more. What if they arrive when its too late?

Tears welled up in Jesse's eyes, but she quickly wiped them away. She just couldn't shake off the unbearable feeling, she felt like it was going to happen. She tigtened her grip on the window sill, feeling more heavyhearted and dizzy than before. "Why...?" Jesse questioned, harshly running her hand through her slightly knotted hair. "Why am I the one suffering!?" She half-shouted, frustration boiling in her veins.

She felt cold tears well up in her eyes again, "....Just why is it always me...."

Her cocoa eyes sparkled with tears as they streamed down her slightly rosy cheeks, "...I don't understand!" Jesse shouted, her heart frantically beating with despair and anguish. She didn't want comfort at the moment she only wanted to let her buried emotions out. She wanted to let them run free and get them out of her hair. All she wanted was to be happy again, to smile like she used to and to laugh without forcing herself to.

Her back started to shake and her hands shook rapidly.

After a while, Jesse wiped her dewy face with her quivering arm and sniffled. Then she quickly grabbed a black sweater that was lying neatly in the corner of her room and headed towards the door.

Jesse twisted the butterscotch doorknob and slipped on her raven colored sweater as she felt a piercing breeze collide with her face.

A crestfallen look was in Jesse's dark brown eyes and she slowly walked down the steps, her teeth sinking into the bottom of her ruby colored lips.

She hated how broken she was. It wasn't something she usually felt. The only other time she did feel this way was when Reuben died and that was one of the worst times of her life.

With a trembling and doubtful sigh she began searching for Lukas.

First she checked the small offices then the empty main halls. It took her awhile to figure out where Lukas was, but eventually she found him. He was sitting outside, lost in deep thought, his hands repeatedly rubbing his chin.

His gaze was fixed on one spot and Jesse nervously walked over to him. The golden locket around her neck blew as a gust of wind rolled by. She anxouisly tapped Lukas lightly on the shoulder.

It took Lukas a moment, before he snapped out of his deep train of thought and glanced behind him, his azure glimmering eyes meeting drowsy cinnamon ones.

You'll only make a fool out of yourself...

Your wasting your time...

Why would he care anyway...

Jesse gulped and she felt her piercing hands start to shake, as anxiety crept back into her system.

"You okay Jesse?" Lukas asked, starting to stand up. Jesse stood frozen in place, feeling her breathing quicken and her chest uncontrollably flare.

"I...I...," She stammered, her red eyes beggining to shine. She quickly blinked the new tears away, "I....," She felt her hoarse voice dying out.

Lukas tenderly put his hand on her shoulder, his gaze soft and caring.

"Take your time."

"But I don't have much time," Jesse thought to herself, trying her best not to break down again. "I...have....," Her voice cracked and her grief-stricken gaze fell to the ground.

"You have what?" Lukas asked softly, tenderly squeezing her left shoulder.

Jesse felt her heart ache at his gentle touch and her bottom lip quivered. "Are.....you sure....you want to know?"

Lukas nodded and Jesse gazed at him with the pure heartbreak that she felt and she held back a sob.

"I...I," She took a deep trembling breath and spike. more slowly, "...I have cancer...."

----
*Clears throat*

Please don't kill this introverted author, Thank you very much. Anyway, now I bet everything else makes more sense now right?? I don't have much to say sooo guess I'll see you in the next chapter.