thirteen - all of the stars

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Dear hope,

I went to my phsyciatrist again the next day and he said I wasn't getting any better and he asked why and I simply shrugged because I didn't know but then he startled me by saying he knew why and he said its because I didn't want to get any better but I didn't want to know that because I wanted to get better, hell I even wanted to forget about you but you weren't letting me.

Then, he asked whether I still wanted to talk about you that day and I asked back what's there to talk about when I already told him everything about you and he questioned if I still remember when I told him how you dissapeared twice somehow, maybe there was something with my eyes that didn't catch you walking away it or maybe it was just that you actually dissapeared (which I don't know how) either way, I said yes and he told me to meet up with him tomorrow because he had something important to discuss with me and thats when I exited his building and went home.

I've always wanted to be alone because I didn't like being around people but i've never wanted to be lonely but I felt lonely that day.

That night, while I lied on my bed gazing at the stars, I thought about how decades can pass, you can move country, wars can be fought, people can die, people can change, but the stars will always stay the same. They stay constant, they're really the only reliable thing in life when you weren't.

Love,

Noel

Sorry, I took forever to update this time! and this chapter is shorter than the others ones because I have a lot planned for the next chapter

But don't forget to vote and conment :)

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