Anathema

seven - be concerned

Tyler hopped up the steps in front of his house and paused to squeeze out his beanie and the sleeves of his hoodie. He couldn't feel his ears or his nose, and his fingers and toes were almost entirely numb. He opened the door very slowly, hoping to sneak in and dry off before his mother saw, but he wasn't so lucky.

"Tyler! There you are!" his mother shouted from the kitchen, coming in to scold him. "Where were you?"

"I went to the park," he said, slipping his wet shoes off and leaving them by the door. He tried to walk past her to the stairs, but she blocked his way. "I told you before I left."

"I said you couldn't go."

"Actually, you said I could if -"

"I was just worried about you," she said, cutting him off with an exasperated sigh.

"I'm - I'm sixteen, Mom. I just went to the park. It's okay, promise." Tyler could see Nico and Clancy at the top of the stairs, watching him, though Clancy ducked around the wall when he looked up.

"I know, honey, I just..." She paused and ran her fingers through her hair. "I worry about you. Sometimes you scare me."

"Because I want to get out of the house?" he asked, confused.

"Because you're always out of the house. You're always outside practicing, and when you're not, you're upstairs in your room alone."

"But I'm not alone," he said before he could stop himself.

She fell silent as her brow furrowed in confusion, and then after a second, her eyes widened in realization. She went pale, though she tried to hide her obvious fear. "I thought we agreed that this wasn't funny anymore," she said slowly, trying to glare at him, but it didn't quite come across. She just looked worried.

"Sorry," he said, shifting his weight with a squish of wet clothes. His wet jeans rubbed against his thighs uncomfortably, and he started to push past his mother to go upstairs, but she stopped him again.

"You really still see them?" she asked softly.

He dropped his eyes to the ground and refused to look at any of them - at her. "Sorry. I know it's not funny."

"Tyler, do you really still see them?" she repeated, raising her voice a little.

Tyler heard a soft yelp and glanced up to see Clancy sitting on the top step next to Nico and staring at his thumb, a bright streak of scarlet running down his skin from where he must have bitten too hard. For once, Nico didn't say anything. He just glared right at him as if he'd disobeyed him. I told you not to tell her.

"Tyler, please answer me." His mother sounded desperate now. Pleading. "Those two boys you told me about years ago, I can't remember their names -"

"Clancy and Nico, yes, I still see them," Tyler snapped, suddenly angry and frustrated that she'd pestered him like that. If he was going to tell her at all, he'd wanted it to be on his own terms. Instead, she'd squeezed it out of him like a sponge, and he wasn't ready. "Happy now?"

Immediately, her eyes filled with tears. He tried to ignore them as he shoved past her and started up the stairs, but she grabbed his arm to stop him. "Tyler, please tell me about them," she whispered. "I want to help you."

Nico snorted and mumbled a sarcastic "yeah, right" under his breath. Clancy wouldn't look up, and kept his thumb in his mouth to stop the bleeding.

"I don't want to talk about them," Tyler said, pulling his arm a little and hoping she'd let him go upstairs.

"Do they ever hurt you? Do they threaten you? Tyler, I need to know."

But he knew what she was saying. I need to know what kind of doctor to call to get help. She thought he was crazy. Maybe he was. "No. They're usually nice. I don't want to talk about it."

"Nico's never nice," Clancy grumbled. The other boy hit his arm, and he rubbed it with a muffled protest.

"You have to learn to talk about it, honey, or you'll never get better."

Tyler actually recoiled in surprise. "I'm not sick," he snapped, yanking his arm out of his mother's grip.

"No, no, of course not." Now she sounded as if her voice was tip-toeing around the broken glass of her son, and he hated it.

"Stop talking to me like that," he demanded.

"Like what?" The tears were ready to spill. He could see them welling up on her eyelids.

"Like - like that. Like I'm seven. Like I'm your messed up little puppy. I'm sick of it." He turned his back to her and started up the stairs.

"Tyler, what is wrong with you today? You're never like this," she said, her voice quivering like an aspen.

"Oh, I don't know," he said sarcastically, spinning back around to face her. "Maybe it's because the one time in my life I actually have fun with someone, I come home to you yelling at me about the two imaginary people you've never believed in anyway!"

"Stop yelling," Clancy mumbled, trying to shrink into his shoulders and covering his ears.

"You went with someone?"

"I said I don't want to talk about it!"

"Tyler Joseph, don't use that tone of voice with me. I am trying to help you. Who did you go with?"

"Stop yelling," Clancy moaned louder, his fingers tight in his hair.

Tyler ignored him. "All you're doing is yelling at me and treating me like a baby! I told you to stop it!"

Her eyes narrowed, though they were still filled with tears. "The only person yelling here is you. I don't care if you are sixteen, I will still ground you."

"Stop yelling!" Clancy wailed, and Tyler whipped around.

"Will you shut up?"

The house went completely silent.

"Tyler?" his mother finally said, very softly and very, very carefully. "Tyler, honey, who are you talking to?"

He realized his mistake in an instant. He glanced at his mother, staring up at him in something almost like terror, and then at the imaginary boy sitting on the steps, who had started to cry into his hands. "No one," he said, stuffing his hands in his hoodie pockets and storming upstairs. He thought he could feel the air around him crackle like lightning.

He slammed his bedroom door shut and leaned his head back against it, squeezing his eyes shut and gritting his teeth. How had one of the best days of his life turned into one of the worst? Why wouldn't she listen? Why had he started yelling when she'd done nothing wrong? Why was he so absolutely screwed up?

He slid to the floor, pulled his knees to his chest, and started to cry.