Not over you

Talking(chapter 22)

I sat on the opposite couch from Lauren "so what do you want to talk about?"i asked smiling playing dumb she narrowed her eyes at me, "I think you know camz"she told me.

I shook my Head still playing dumb again and she stood and made her way over beside me, I looked down at my hands, "why camz?"she questioned "why what?"i asked knowing exactly what she meant.

"Why are you hurting your self?"she asked quietly I still haven't made eye contact with her, this is really hard to talk about, especially with her.

"It's hard"i told her "what is?"she questioned I looked up at her with a questioning look she just narrowed her eyes. "what is? really lauren?? how about the fact that my dad killed himself or the fact that my mom disappears for weeks comes back then goes again, or that I was extremely bullied in New Zealand and it's happening again her, the fact that I'm gay I have depression eating disorder and I cut my self like a fucking emo"i snapped at her my eyes starting to water.

She just stared at me obviously thinking of what to say. "you know the worst thing is"i mumbled catching her attention "I lost my bestfriend" I told her she cut eye contact and took. A long breath.

"Camila"she started so we are back to Camila "I don't know what to say your mom and dad must be hard my dad's never here he's always working same as my mom It was just me and Callum until he left for college the bulling thing I wasn't there to prevent it in New Zealand but I'm here now and it'll stop embrace that your gay don't thing of it as a reason to hate yourself! your eat disorder and self harm are issues I'm willing to help you with camz and don't listen to Michael he is an asshole!" she told me.

I stared at her confused "you want to help me"I asked her tears pouring down my cheeks! she nodded "you told me we weren't going to be friends again you said that you were different, this is the first time since Iv been back youv been nice to me why?" I lifted my head to look at her.

"Don't listen to what I said when you left I went of course and became that Lauren and how your back I'm changing back it's you I don't know how to explain it, but camz I am sorry for the way Iv been acting it's what I'm used to now"she told me not breaking eye contact.

I was about to thank her when my phone went off, I answered it without checking the caller ID,

"Hello?" I spoke into the phone.

"Mila? Jade said you weren't feeling well again, are you okay?"perrie questioned I smiled at her worriedness,

"Yeah pez I'm just not feeling up to a sleepover and I'm talking to lauren"i told her taking a glance over to Lauren who was eyeing me carefully.

"Why? what's happened? has she annoyed you again?"perrie started firing questions

"No no she hasn't done anything we're just talking pez"i told her,

Lauren narrower her eyes at me,

"Should I come over?"she questioned I frowned why would she have to come over?

"What? no you don't have to come over I'm just talking to lauren"i told her Lauren smirking at me,which I flushed at,

"You sure your just talking?"she asked I frowned again "you really don't trust me? yes we are just talking perrie we have been fighting none stop what do you think we're doing making out?"i snapped into the phone.

And turned to find a wide eyed laughing lauren.

"Yeah I get it sorry babe just jealousy"she told me I smiled slightly "it's fine I'll text you later ok?" "yea okay bye mila m"she told me, "bye babe"i hung up.

"Bye babe"lauren mocked me standing up and heading into the kitchen,

"Ha ha funny"i told her sarcastically "so you girlfriends got trust issues"she smirked I narrowed my eyes at her "no she's just worried"i told her,

She laughed "you know I was beside you when you were on the phone right?"she asked I nodded blushing slightly realising I had asked perrie if she didn't trust me.

"I'm not keen on her" Lauren told me "yes I know which we have to talk about also"i told her and she squinted a little.

"What about your girlfriend"she spat she keeps referring to her as my girlfriend instead of just perrie,

"Yes well you can't be a jerk to her eveytime she's with me I don't even get why you don't like her"i told her honestly,

"You do, you just don't realise it yet"she smiled she stood up from the kitchen counter "well I'm going out with vero you welcome to join if you like?"she offers I shake my head,

"Thanks but I have a box set of pretty little liars calling my name"i smiled smug at her and she laughed, "okie doks well I should be back before midnight"she told me and I nodded.

She stood awkwardly for a moment before coming towards me and embracing me in a hug I was shocked at first but then settled into it, "bye camz"she mumbled into my neck "bye"i managed to croak out and with that she pulled away and left with a bang of the front door.