I don't know what's going on. Owen won't tell me anything, no matter how many times I ask.
We've just been sitting in an ER exam room, waiting for Mason to be done with some test that the doctor called an 'echocardiogram'.
Whatever the hell that is.
Owen is sitting next to me and staring at the empty exam table that my brother occupied half an hour ago. The lights in the room are harsh, and the smell is a mixture of chemicals and rubbing alcohol. Not to mention, the hard, plastic seats are making me squirmy and uncomfortable. Definitely not where I want to spend my night.
But Owen and the doctor know something I don't, and it's really starting to piss me off. It's not my fault I didn't go to medical school and I don't know what the hell a 'heart murmur' is, or that I don't get enough service in this stupid room to look it up on google. But they both keep talking about this murmur, and I'm getting anxious because no one will give me the answers that I need.
"Will you please explain what's going on? Why are we here?" I ask Owen for what feels like the thousandth time.
Owen sits up and rubs his chin without bothering to look at me.
"We don't need to worry until we get the test results back."
"Worry?" I push, sitting up in my chair. "Owen, what the hell is wrong?"
His eyes finally flick to me and he holds a steady gaze for a moment. He looks conflicted, like he can't decide whether or anything not to elaborate. With careful thought, I watch as he slowly relents and sighs back into his chair.
"Your brother has a heart murmur. I heard it when I listened to his heart earlier."
"So? What's a heart murmur?"
"It means he has abnormal blood flow in his heart," he says, adjusting his position in the creaky chair. "It could've been harmless, but he was complaining about chest pain and his breathing wasn't right, so I could tell something was wrong. But the heart murmur could be an indication of a congenital heart defect. Possibly a hole in his valves or atria."
I nod and thank my anatomy class for somewhat allowing me to understanding what he's saying.
"So he might have a hole in his heart? How bad is that? Is it treatable?"
"It's usually pretty treatable."
My stomach plummets at what were supposed to be reassuring words. The white tiles on the ground feel like they're swirling as his use of the word 'usually' zips through my restless mind.
"Usually?"
He glances at me before taking a deep breath.
"It can be fatal if the hole is big enough. We won't know until the test results come—"
Owen's speech is interrupted by the heavy wooden door creaking open. A doctor of particularly old age comes in with a tablet in his hand and a neutral, completely stoic face.
"So," he addresses while finding a spot to stand in from of the medical counter. "I want to start by saying that Mason's been admitted. He's already upstairs in the pediatric wing."
Owen nods and follows along urgently while I'm still trying to wrap my head around what the fuck is going on.
"Okay, and the echo?"
The doctor pauses and clicks a few buttons on his tablet.
"Well, he does have an ASD, just like we thought."
A knowing look passes between them and it leaves me out once again, although this time I'm ready to demand answers. If my brother's condition was bad enough to get him admitted to the hospital, I'm going to know what's going on.
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Yours Truly, Ramona
قصص المراهقينLife doesn't abide by the rules of a child. Sixteen-year-old Ramona knows this. She's seen it throughout her entire life, from the way she was treated by her birth parents to the way she was thrown around the foster system with nothing but her litt...
