Mailboxes and Park Benches ~A Ftm story~

Chapter 25:This is NOT an ending

"Are you kidding?" Luke could feel his heart rate increase by a probably unhealthy amount. He wasn't even sure how to react. He just felt so overjoyed for Ryan. He couldn't believe he had come this far.
"No! My parents were like 'so you want to be a boy and to do that you go on T?' And I was like 'well I am a boy but to help my body fit who I am, yes.' And they said how they were a little nervous about it but they said that they were trying to do their research and learn as much as they could and if that's what I really 100% needed and I knew for sure, (which I do) then they would look into it more! I can't even believe it!"
"Me neither, man! Aww I'm so happy for you!" Luke stood up and walked around the table to hug Ryan, who stood up and welcomed the embrace.
"You can finally be you!"
"I can finally be free!"
"I'm so proud of you, Ryan." Luke cupped Ryan's face in his hands.
"I'll be here to support you and whatever you do. As long as it's not unhealthy." He added. Ryan opened his mouth as if to say something but instead responded with a kiss.
"Thank you so much. I wouldn't be here without you." He said, arms dangling around Luke's neck.
"Of course. I'm glad I could be here for you. I really am glad I met you." Luke whispered.
"Hi, Ryan!" Ryan let go of Luke as his mom walked into the room.
"Mom! Hey! Ryan has great news!"

Luke stared at Ryan as they sat together in the back seat of Ryan's mom's car. He was all tensed up, his face red from smiling. His hands rested on his lap, fidgeting together. He sat up straight, eyes flicking around the car. It had been about two months since Ryan found out his parents would let him go on T and today was finally the day. Ryan looked happier then he ever had in his whole life.
"You look excited." Luke teased and Ryan looked at him, then away again. He was like a squirrel or something that couldn't keep his attention in one place for more then a second. Luke couldn't help but giggle at how energetic he was.
"It is a big day." Luke leaned back in his chair.
"I'm proud of you. Look how far you've come."
"Shut up!" Ryan squealed.
"Keep talking and I'll get so excited I'll jump out of the fucking window."
"Language, Ryan." His Mom warned, glancing at him trough the rear-view mirror.
"I'm not a child."
"You look like your gonna pee." Luke smirked, earning a playful punch from Ryan.
"Honestly I might." Luke laughed whole heartedly.
"Don't. I'll kill you." His mother said sternly, but beneath the seriousness was a joking tone. Luke could tell she was happy for her son, too. It was funny. Not to long ago she was lecturing Ryan on how he should love his body when really that meant 'love yourself for who you're not.' And now she was a proud mother, helping her son to be his true self. Luke was right after all. She did come around.
"I might die before you can kill me." Ryan said lively.
"You don't seem like your dying. Too happy to be dying."
"If I WAS dying, I WOULD be happy."
"Aww come on. It's a happy day. There's no room for self-deprecating humor."
"No. There's always room for self-deprecating humor."
"If you say so, king emo."
"Um... no..."
"Sorry forgot that's Gerard."
"No Gerard is Geesus."
"Right. And it can't be Brendon because he's Satan."
"Yup."
"So then who's the king?" Ryan thought for a second.
"Yea your right it's me."
"I can't even tell if that's self-deprecating humor or self...righteous humor."
"Why not both?"
"Can it be both?"
"Nobody's perfect so I'm perfect."
"Oh. That was beautiful. You've proved me wrong." After what seemed like forever, the car pulled into a parking lot and found an empty spot. Once the car pulled to a stop, Ryan put a hand to his chest.
"Oh my god."
"What?"
"This is actually happening." Luke smiled a toothy grin as he got out of the car.
"Well it won't if you just sit there." He said peeking into the car.
"Common." He slammed the door shut. Ryan got out of the car and shook out his hands.
"Oh my god. Ok. Let's go." He said with an excited sigh. When they walked into the building, they checked in and sat in the waiting room for a while, until someone walked into the room.
"Ryan?" Luke and Ryan's Mom both smiled at him as all three of them stood up and went with the doctor.

Ryan pulled open the camera app on his phone as the car zoomed down the street. When the doctor had called Ryan's name, they went with him to a room. The doctor had talked with them and told them all about T and what it would do and how it worked. After the talk, he showed Ryan how to do it, and gave him his first shot. The room was full of smiles and hugs. After that, they made their way out and back to the car. Ryan clicked on the video button and held the phone up to his face.
"Ready?" He turned to Luke for a moment.
"It's your video you tell me." He teased with a hint of sass. Ryan set the phone back down.
"Ahh I'm bad at videos. This is gonna be awkward. What should I say?"
"It doesn't have to be a big, long, grand video. Just make it short and sweet. Your going to need the room on your phone anyways." Luke mumbled the last part, taking into consideration his own phone that was always yelling at him for having a full storage.
"Ok. Yea. Yes. I'll just say the basics." Ryan sighed, shaking off his nerves.
"This isn't even that big of a deal. Ok actually it kind of is but it should be easy, shouldn't it?" He asked Luke.
"Well it clearly isn't."
"Ok ok. I've got this." Ryan held the phone back up and before he could convince himself otherwise, clicked the play button.
"Hey. I'm Ryan and this is my first day on T." He gave a small, nervous smile before ending the video. He played it and put the phone in between the middle of him and Luke. It repeated the same phrase back to them, showing Ryan's small, innocent smile. Luke could feel his heart melt.
"Aww your so adorable." He leaned over and hugged Ryan, who blushed.
"Your getting so many cuddles today."