SIN [yoonmin]

Twenty

[you can say Yoongi is mean (Min ;) ) here]

Yoongi stays frozen in place, lips not moving against the younger's. He needs a second longer to react.

With harsh movements, he pushes Jimin hard enough that he hits the wall behind roughly. The small string of spit connecting their mouths breaks with the force.

Jimin is not given a second to understand what is happening, before a blooming pain is felt from his face.

Yoongi has just slapped him.

Tears instantly gather into his eyes and gently cups the red, pained cheek with a shaky hand. He looks with venom up into the anger-filled eyes of the priest.

"You are so selfish, Jimin. I let you do your ways, embarrassing myself in front of you, my own self and God especially, but you refuse despite being obsessive about it. Now you kiss me when I do not wish for such a thing."

Jimin feels anger breaking through him.

"Sure, because doing it with someone who looks dead is the most pleasure thing ever. You weren't showing any emotion, of course I wouldn't feel excited to do shit with you."

The younger shakes his head, drops the hand from his face and turns to go to the kitchen.

"I do understand now why you became a priest. Are you sure it's because of that dude of yours or because you aren't good at anything else?"

The moment Yoongi starts speaking, it's the loudest Jimin has ever heard him, and that scares him slightly.

"You want to know exactly why I don't want you kissing me? Why I don't feel anything about you touching me? Because you aren't worth it! You aren't quality, you are constantly showing how much of a cheap person you are, and I don't want you anywhere near me intimately! You are nothing compared to what I had."

And then silence follows.

Every word Yoongi just screamed into his face repeating itself, hunting him and making him self conscious in a bad way.

Hurt, he turns and runs towards his room, the trip and all the rest of people forgotten.

His eyes are clouded by tears, making him trip onto the stairs and falling to his knees.

He suddenly sobs, the hurt and pain of the crude words making him grip his hair, wanting to disappear and never face the priest again.

With shaky legs, he stands up and finishes his way to the bedroom. He turns and locks the door, so people won't be able to enter and get him for the trip.

He lets himself fall next to the bed, the floor cold underneath him. His eyes are stuck on a piece of wood of the floor, as his mind processes what happened.

'Because you aren't worth it'

The insecurities are taking over his being, making him believe Yoongi's statement.

Perhaps he never found someone who loves him, someone of quality, like Taehyung found Mira, because he isn't worth of it.

Maybe, all this time, he wasn't the one changing partners and being picky about them, maybe the others were and he was left with his own ego. For so long, he was let to believe he got to choose whichever partners, but those were perhaps the 'easy' ones, just like him.

His hand is still gripping his hair, frustration at himself reaching maximum levels.

His parents sent him away to live with a stranger because he is not good enough as their son.

This stranger hates him because of his everything. He is disgusting, not worth it, easy, he understands. Why wouldn't Yoongi dislike him?

Hoseok now hates him because he took advantage of his weakness. He almost forcedly sucked someone off. He is a pathetic embarrassment.

In Jimin's mind a plan is forming. They don't need him here. They don't actually need him anywhere.

He can run away. He can go on his own, find someone to accept the embarrassing human being he is. Someone will accept and welcome him, because he can't be the only one so unworthy in this world.

He will find somewhere to go. He just needs to leave from here.

He wipes his swollen, tear stained face and stands up. He feels weak, mentally weak in a strange way, but he can feel the hope filling him.

He goes to the window and tugs the curtains open. Outside in the front garden, all the group is gathered, dressed accordingly. Both priests are there as well, talking amongst themselves and sometimes cracking a smile.

'He must be worth it.' Jimin thinks bitterly.

Unexpectedly, Yoongi looks up. Although there is a lot of distance between where he stands and Jimin's window, he feels like the older is staring into his soul.

Jimin goes to the bathroom attached to his room and washes his face. When he looks up, he can see his red-ish eyes, pale face and messy hair. He arranges himself to the best of his current capabilities, before collecting everything off the sink and throwing them into his bag.

He looks out the window and sees the group slowly moving, arranging into a long line, going two by two.

He hurries to gather all his clothes, not bothering to arrange them and just pushes them to fit into the bag. He takes his charger before closing the bag with a bit of struggle.

With his bag ready and placed securely into his back, he looks again out the window. No one is anymore into the garden, so he takes this as his time to leave.

Opening the door to his room, he steps outside into the hallway, hurrying, but being careful in case Yoongi stayed behind or any of the nuns are around.

He is able to go down the stairs without hearing anyone closely, so he basically runs on his tiptoes towards the front door.

He turns back a second, just as a last reminder of the place, and opens the door slightly to sneak out.

Holding onto his bag's streps, adrenaline is rushing through his body. He hasn't done much of the plan yet, but he is feeling confident.

Arriving in front of the big gate, he sees the path goes both to left and right. He has seen the group going to right, so when he steps outside the rectory's area, he turns towards left.

He takes in a shaky breath, hands shaking and starts walking fast.

***
[omg I apologize for how long i have been absent

My trip to Japan and Korea has been absolutely amazing !!!

I wrote this chapter in around 15 minutes, so I hope it makes sense *hides* I really had to update !

Thank you all for being patient!

Enjoyyy!!!]