Another Boy Without A Sharper Knife (Kellic)

Chaper 17

*Kellin's POV*

Everything sucks since Vic left. It's only been 2 days but it feels like at least 3 weeks. All I've really done is sleep and chill in my room. The guys obviously noticed how distant I've been but most of the time I could care less like today for instance. It's early afternoon and the guys just got out of group therapy which I didn't attend. I was lying in bed trying to clear my head as I stared up at the ceiling.

One thing I always do when I want to distract myself is make up movies in my head and pretend that I'm projecting them and watching them on the white tiles. I was currently thinking about getting out of here and going to my favorite coffee shop. They have open mic night and before I came in here my friends forced me to get up and sing in front of everyone. It was pretty much a success and made me realize that I was really into music. As I watched myself grab the mic and give the crowd a smile the door opened.

"Hey man," Matty said, leaning against the door frame. I tried to focus on my little movie but it broke apart and disappeared quickly.

"Yeah?" I mumbled, turning towards him. I wish I didn't because I really didn't like the worried expression on his face.

"You weren't like this when Craig left," Matty stated, sitting on the edge of my bed. I just groaned. "Kel, you should come to crafts it starts in 5 minutes."

I shook my head, pushing my face down into the pillow making it hard to breathe. "I don't want to," my muffled voice whined. I would rather just lay here all day.

"Come on Kellin, time to get up. You're coming to talk and hang out with us." Matty got up and grabbed my feet, ready to pull me off the bed. I latched onto the sheets trying my hardest to stay on the mattress. It didn't work.

With a thump I was pulled off the bed and onto the hard ground the blankets coming down on me.

"Oh look! You're up! Follow me," Matty smirked, grabbing my hand and pulling me up. I just grumbled and glared, following him out to the guys.

"Hey Kels!" Alex called, looking up from his drawing. I gave them all a half hearted wave. "Did you hear Tony is getting out tomorrow?" Alex asked, gesturing to the boy next to him who had the biggest grin on his face. Tony doesn't talk or smile much. It when he does it's contagious.

"Oh really?" I asked, trying not to let jealously creep into my voice. The boy just nodded the smile not even faltering. "Good for you man." I looked down at the blank table in front of me before grabbing a sheet of paper and drawing absentmindedly, my pencil just running across the page.

I want to get out of here. I deserve to get out of here. It's going on a month now. I mean they can't keep me in here forever right? I just want to get back out into the real world, hang with my friends, avoid my family, and maybe even meet up with Vic. I haven't heard from him since he left which created a sinking feeling in my chest. Alex gave me his cellphone number but I wasn't going to make first contact. If he wanted to talk to me he would.

I wasn't used to this whole feelings thing. The past few days just proved to me that I actually really liked the kid. That's probably why I've been doing so bad lately. The short time he was here has been the best time I've had in months even with the whole ward 3 thing. I sighed and looked down at my poorly drawn bird. For some reason I was really into feathers recently.

"Kellin?" A nurse asked from the doorway getting my attention. "The doctor would like to see you." Oh great, this can't be good. He's probably just going to be pissed that I haven't gone to group lately. Seeing him does give me the chance to ask him when I'm getting the hell out of here though. It's weird, before Vic I had no desire to leave but now this place feels like a cramped cage.