fourteen

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Aerglo stares out the window, xyr ears ringing with a familiar sound calling for xem, but xe's reluctant to respond.

Xyr eyes land on Caelum, the boy fast asleep and cuddling the pillow xe occupied moments ago, soft puffs of breath escaping the young human.

Xe is torn.

The sound is becoming unbearable and xe needs to reply, to tell xyr crew that xe survived the attack (though barely).  Xe needs to go and find the poison so they can figure out a cure.  Xe needs to go, even though xe doesn't want to.

Warm brown eyes look up at xem, the stars glistening in them, "You need to go, right?"

Aerglo stares back at the boy.

"I can hear it too," Caelum rasps tiredly, wincing as he sits up, the sheet slipping off of his debauched body, "go."

Aerglo doesn't move.  The urge to go is prominent, xe doesn't belong here.  However, the need to protect xyr mate is stronger and can't even compare to whatever else xe might feel.  Caelum has become xyr everything.

Xe walks toward the bed and slips beside the human, wrapping an arm around the boy's body.  Xe buries xyr face in the crook of Caelum's neck and breathes deeply.

If xe goes, Caelum will have to stay.

Xe'll need to focus on xyr mission and make xyr planet safe again before xe can even consider bringing Caelum home.

But that could take years.

"Go," Caelum mumbles, arms wrapped around the alien tightly and contradicting his words to leave.

"Cael," Xe huffs in frustration and reluctance, "I do not wish to leave you-"

"I know," Caelum sighs, "but if you go, you get to save your people and end a war that's been causing so much destruction.  Me?  I'm just one person who doesn't have val-"

"Do not finish that statement, eno elttil," Aerglo growls, "You are so much more to me, you are my mate, my strength, my everything."

"I... I know and these past few days have been so amazing, Aerglo, and I... I love you.  But you need to go and I always knew that.  I can't and I won't hold you back.  You're important, you're the captain of a freaking ship, you command and lead and you're just... you're amazing.  And they need you.  I-I survived many years without you."

"That is not how it works.  Regardless of how long we've lived without the other, of how much you've endured, you are my priority and the one person I've vowed myself to protect-"

"I know that," Caelum assures, grabbing Aerglo's thin heated hand and placing it on his chest, "I feel it here.  I know you want to protect me, but you made a promise with your people first.  I'm simply telling you that it's okay for you to go, because I love you and I will wait for you."

Aerglo leans down and presses a kiss to plump lips, stealing the boy's breath away, "I will return."

"I know," Caelum smiles.

"I love you," the alien whispers.

"I love you too, Aerglo."

Caelum stares as the alien begins to dissolve and turn into what seems like star dust.  The small particles soon disappear with a flash of light that nearly blinds him and he's left alone in his room, in the darkness of the night.  He scrambles out of bed and rushes to the window but he can't see anything.

All he can do is look up at the sky and hope Aerglo is safe and reunited with xyr comrades. 

With trembling hands, he touches his fingers to his tingling lips and revels in the fading feeling of warmth left behind from his mate.

He can feel the absence of Aerglo, the emptiness inside his heart making it constrict and ache for xem.  Tears well up in his eyes, but he holds onto the notion that he did the right thing.

He doesn't move for a long while and when he does, his sore stiff legs barely carry him to bed where he plops down and buries himself in blankets and pillows.

He holds Aerglo's pillow tightly in his hands and buries his face in it, breathing in deeply and finding the remnants of Aerglo's scent.

And as he curls up in bed, hating the cold and the loneliness that seeps into his bones, he whispers, "hurry up, Aerglo, and come back safe."

If he falls asleep with a few stray tears soaking the pillow beneath his head, he doesn't notice.

The last thing he does feel, though, are warm fingers running through his messy hair.

"I love you, eno elttil."

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