Pernico - Survivor

Ch.15 Have you been crying?

Hi, sorry about the wait for this chapter. But on the bright side, my house is officially up for sale! Now that I finally have some time to relax, I decided to update for you guys. I'm updating from my computer for the first time, so I appologize if it's a bit different.  :P

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Nico's P.O.V 

I closed the cabin door behind me, as a smile erupted on my face. I had just had a movie marathon with the guy I like, and then hung out on the beach with him and watched the sunset. Am I dreaming? I quickly pinched myself, just to be sure this wasn't a dream. When I felt the slight pain, I knew it had all been real. I raised a hand to my mouth to muffle the giggle that had bubbled out of me. I felt like a highschool girl, after her first date. I shook my head, in an attempt to clear my thoughts. Evidently, it didn't work, because as I was changing into my PJ's, all I could think about was a certain son of the sea god. I thought about how perfect his hair looked in the light of the sunset. How soft his lips looked when he was looking out to sea. I attempted to clear my thoughts again after noticing that I had been stanging with my shirt off for five minutes. I quickly slipped on my PJ shirt, and went to brush my teeth. The sound of the running water was the only source of noise in my cabin, which was just as it should be. Well, I wouldn't mind a little music... I pulled my ipod out of my back pocket, and pulled out the head phones. It's not like I would be disrupting anyone, since I was the only child of Hades. I quickly selected my Bastille playlist. The soft notes began, as I slipped the toothbrush in my mouth. As Flaws continued to play, I let my thoughts be entirely filled with the task at hand. 

I rinsed off my toothbrush, and placed it back in it's drawer along with the toothpaste. As I looked back up into the mirror, my eyes began to focus on my refelction. Immediately, the quiet music from my ipod became background noise, as the dark thoughts entered my mind. It was as if I had no control, as I had to endure my thoughts rip away every single deatil of my appearance. I had to endure all of my flaws being pointed out again, and again, as I stood and listened helplessly. I can't remember when the tears began rolling down my cheek, but when I reached a hand to my face, I felt the cool liquid sliding down my face. After completely tearing my apperance apart, the little monster inside of me began to make comments about my personality. The sad thing was that all of those comments were true. I mean, why would someone want to hang out with a socially awkward, son of Hades? I couldn't even keep a good conversation going. I unconsiously made my way to my bed as the thoughts keep ripping me apart. Then I made the decision to turn up the volume on my ipod. Anything to block out the voice in my head. The loud notes of The Draw slowly began to fill my thoughts instead of those cruel comments. I pulled my knees up to my chest and took a few deep breaths to calm myself down. Any normal person would have found it strange how I was able to calm myself down with the music blaring that loud, but then again, I wasn't normal. 

 After managing to clear the thoughts in my head, I turned down the volume, and went to shut off the bathroom light, that I had left on during that little episode. I avoided the mirror as I fumbled for the light switch with my eyes facing the floor. Finally, the room went dark, after my fingers were able to do their job. I was interrupted in my journey to my bed, by a knock at the door. I qickly rushed to the door, curious as to who would come to my cain this late at night. I slowly opened to door, slightly worried it would be someone I didn't want to see. As I recognised my visitior, a small smile graced my lips.

"Hey Nico, I brought your clothes. Don't worry, they've been washed." Percy announced as he handed over my clothes, not really looking at me. 

"Thanks." I replied as I took the clothes in my arms. Percy then raised his eyes to my face, and immediately a look of worry flashed in his eyes. 

"Have you been crying?" 

"What? No... I was just...um..." I trailed off, playing with the hem of my PJ shirt.

"Yes, you have. What's wrong?" He asked, as he stepped closer. I took a step back, out of habit, and a look of hurt crossed his eyes. I quickly averted my eyes, and began rubbing my arm awkwardly. Percy, however, was not willing to drop the subject.

"Nico, I can tell that you've been crying. Please let me help. Isn't that what friends are for?" He asked. Friends. Because that's all we'll ever be. I felt tears brimming my eyes again, as some of the dark thoughts made another apperance. Of course Percy would only want to be friends. He was Mr.Tall-and-perfect, and I was Mr.Small-and-scrawny. He had a great personality and looked like a model, and I didn't even belong in this century. I felt a few tears escape their confinement, and make a break for the ground. They began slowly at first, but after the first few tears, I broke down. I began sobbing, just as Percy wrapped his arms around me. As the tears kept falling, I felt Percy rub circles into my back, in an attempt to comfort me. 

 I just kept crying, hiccuping for breath, as the time went on. Before I knew it, the sun began to rise. By now, we had ended up on our knees on my front doorstep. I finally regained control of my body, and got to my feet, a little clumsily. I wiped my eyes, and took a few deep breaths, as Percy joined me on his feet. I took in his appearance, as he tried to dust off his jeans. His black hair was ruffled, but still managed to look good. He had small bags under his eyes for staying up all night with me, which I felt a pang of guilt for. If it weren't for me, he would be well rested, and he wouldn't have to be worrying about me. 

"Percy?" I asked, my voice slighlty cracking. 

"Yes?" 

"Thanks... For everything." I said as I shifted my gaze to the floor. Without warning I found myself in his warm embrace. I weakly hugged back without a second thought. I don't think I will ever get used to this feeling. I felt so safe in his arms, as if everything was alright. As we pulled apart, I couldn't help but feel cold after the warmth of his hug. 

"Now, will you please tell me what's wrong?" He asked gently, looking deep into my eyes.

"Everything." I muttered. 

"Explain." 

"I just... Nothing goes right. I can't even look into a mirror anymore. Everything reminds me of my insecurities." I held my breath waiting for him to just call me a freak and get on with his life. When I didn't hear any sound escape his mouth, I figured he was still taking it in, so I thought 'screw it', why not just jump right in. I took a deep breath, before taking a huge risk.

"Also... I'm gay." I added. When I got no reply, I sprinted into my cabin and found the darkest corner. My last thought before I shadow travelled out of there was of the look on Percy's face when I announced my sexuality. It showed no emotion, so I decided I would be strong and show no emotion as I fled the scene. 

I exited the shadows and immediately regretted the length of my shadow travel. I had gone a bit too far, and now I could barely make out my surroundings through my red-tinged vision. The last thing I remember seeing before passing out, was the shocked face of Persephone. 

"Nico?"

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Well... That ended up being a bit more dramatic than I expected. I'm sorry if there's any spelling mistakes, as I said before, this is my first time uploading on a computer. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it! :) Next chapter should be up within a week. :) 

Question: Which camp do you prefer and why? Camp Halfblood or Camp Jupiter?