Chapter 18

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They say I'm like clay
I will erode away

- taken from my poetry book "A boy in this f***ing world".

1

The sun ached through the shutters, sprinkling into the bedroom like droplets of light. Shari's head rested gently on Justin's chest, her fingers gently tracing the muscle of his abdominals, causing his tiny invisible blonde hairs to turn up on his skin. He still remained in his slumber, breathing up and down lightly and giving an occasional sleepy grumble.

Shari hadn't been with a guy for a long time. Of course, she had had relationships, but as soon it got into the serious six month milestone, she would cut them out. For that meant they would have to really know her. And that was too much for Shari. But Justin already knew her. Justin understood her, and that somehow was enough.

For a while, Shari laid on his chest, staring at the streams of morning sunlight in the silence, basking in the peace. She had slept dreamlessly last night, for the first time in a long time, feeling as if she could actually relax in this moment in time.

Eventually, Shari slid out of the bed and pulled on her clothes, sliding through the bedroom door and descended the staircase.

She pulled on her jacket and gave herself a once-over in the mirror. Her red hair was frayed all over, big and bushy, still ruffled from sleeping. She shrugged.

As she placed her hand on the door handle, she heard a voice and almost screamed in fright.

"Leaving so soon?" Justin said from the staircase. He was wearing nothing but a pair of shorts.

"I, um, I can't live out of my savings account forever. I need to go job hunting, gotta pay my board somehow." Shari said quickly. She didn't fully lie, but she had already done the job hunting on her laptop.

"No breakfast?" Justin asked, raising a dark eyebrow in question.

Shari bit her lip. "No thanks... but coffee? Yes."

Justin flashed her a grin and sauntered into the kitchen, simultaneously stretching his arms into a morning stretch.

He fetched them up some coffee and he made some toast for himself. They sat at the table together.

"What made you come over here last night?" Justin asked, biting into a slice of toast.

Shari took that opportunity to take a sip of her coffee, constructing a reasonable reply in her head. "Erm, I thought it was pretty obvious."

"So what am I? A booty call?" Justin joked.

Shari let out a small laugh. "Look, you know my life is way too complicated for a relationship. I've got too much baggage. I've always told you that, Justin."

"Doesn't stop me from wanting you. It never has." He gave her a wink. "But, in all seriousness, you deserve to be happy."

Shari tensed up and placed her mug on the table. "I don't. Because when I'm happy, it gets taken away from me."

Justin sighed. "You need to let yourself try, even if it's not with me. I just hate to see you so broody all the time."

Shari got to her feet. "I'll see you around."

And she left him at the table with the toast and two cups full of coffee.

2

Scott Davenport felt horrendous. His head pounded and the painkillers hadn't yet kicked in. He dressed himself, his hair still wet from the shower and trudged into the kitchen.

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