I squeeze Toby’s hand as we sit in the waiting room, of the walk-in clinic, for the doctor to come and give us the results of the test.
“You could just be late, remember that.” Toby tells me. I know he’s trying to help and keep me calm but it’s not working. I look around at the supposed-to-be comfy chairs, the coffee table and side tables with magazines spread out on them and a clock hanging above the door. The soft yellow painted walls, a few windows to let in the natural light give the space a comforting feel. It's a feeling that I wish I could hold on to but every tick of the clock makes my nerves spike.
“Miss. Williams?” A nurse asks looking at me I nod and both Toby and I are lead into one of the consult rooms.
I sit down on the padded table that’s lined with paper so it makes a crinkling sound. Toby stands beside me and holds my hand while rubbing my back.
“It’ll be okay. No matter what that test says it’ll be okay. I promise,” I nod my head and lean into him. He’s always been there for me, he’s always been my safe place, the one I could tell anything and everything too.
“Thanks Toby, you’re the best,” He smiles down at me and kisses the top of my head.
“I know Lyssa,” I’m about to respond but the door opens and Dr. Shay walks in.
“Miss. Williams?” I nod my head when she comes in. All that’s going through my head is the result of the test.
“So?” Toby asks after a long awkward silence as Dr. Shay rustles through papers.
“Well, usually I would say congratulations but judging by your age you two weren’t expecting this.” Toby and I share a look before laughing.
“Umm… No… We’re not… He’s my best friend.” I say between laughs, but I stop abruptly when I realize what she just said. “Wait did you just mean that I’m… I’m…” I trial off not being able to say the word.
“Pregnant?” Dr. Shay asks and I nod my head. “Yes, Miss. Williams that is what I was trying to say. Now, since you are young you have a very minimal risk of miscarriage so I’m going to book you an appointment for your first ultrasound for ten weeks from now just to see how everything is coming along and to get some solid information.” It takes me until now for the news to actually hit me. I turn into Toby’s shoulder and start to sob. This can not be happening! I’m fourteen! I’m going to be fifteen when the baby is born! How am I going to take care of it?
“How am I going to take care of it Toby?” I mumble into his shoulder as my sobs die down.
“You’ll have help Aly. Your mom, me, Anna, and Ever. We’ll all be here for you I promise.” He says stroking my hair trying to calm me down.
“But what about him?”
“You tell him. He has a right to know but you come find me and tell me what he says right after, okay?” I nod and he smiles.
“Good, well Dr. Shay gave me some pamphlets to give you to go over about the different things you’ll be going through, frequently asked questions, what helps, what doesn’t and some birthing classes.” I nod on the verge of crying again because it all gets so real and scary again.
“Come on let’s get you home. I’ll stay with you tonight and we’ll tell your mom together.”
“Okay thanks again Toby.”
“It’s no problem Aly, it’s what I’m here for now come on.”
He helps me up and I lean against him for support as we walk out to his car. The drive back to my house leaves us in a comfortable silence with the radio playing softly. I just stare out the window watching cars, houses, and trees go by in a blur.
