Scouts Honor

Chapter 3

Dedicated to LivvinLuvvinLifee for making the awesome cover at the side. :)

 "Would you like me to walk you home?" Bolton asked, after we'd been in the booth for a few hours. It was past midnight.

I'd been hoping he would ask. After all, my house is only three away from his. That's why I started taking him to school every morning. Jesse never liked the idea of me being alone in a car with another guy, even if it was his best friend. He had no reason to worry. He knew I would never cheat on him.

"Sure," I said. I was trying to keep the excitement out of my voice. Why are you so excited? He's just a friend, walking you home. Only, it didn't feel like that at all.

"I was hoping you'd say yes." That brought a smile to my face. I turned around to get my purse as he said, "I wouldn't want anything to happen to Jesse's girlfriend. He'd never let me hear the end of it if I let you walk home alone." That definitely got rid of the smile. Why, I don't know. I guess it's because I thought we'd become good friends, and that would be enough reason for him to want to protect me.

I guess I needed to accept that in his eyes, I was just his best friend's girlfriend, and nothing more. "Are you ready?" I knew Bolton was talking about walking home, but that question held so much more meaning for me. Was I ready to accept everything that happened tonight, and just move on from it tomorrow?

It'll be like tonight never happened. I kept going over Bolton's words, again and again. I wanted him to see me as a friend, maybe even more. Stop right there. You have a boyfriend. You love him, and he loves you. The only problem was, I wasn't so sure about us. I mean, I was sure that I loved him. But, did he love me? And if the time came, would I be ready to let him go and move on?

This is crazy. I was over-thinking things way too much. The party messed with my head. I mean, I'd almost convinced myself that I had feelings for Bolton. That's something that could never happen. Or could it?

I decided to just clear my mind of everything. No more thoughts of Jesse, or Bolton, or Shelly. I would just walk home and go to bed. Thinking clearly would be much easier in the morning.

That's why, instead of answering all of the complicated questions, I answered the simplest one in front of me. "Yes, I'm ready."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The night was clear, and the air was still warm. The black sky was covered in a blanket of stars. There were only a few cars out at this time of night, so it made the walk home peaceful. I think that's one of my favorite parts of living in West Virginia: the calmness that settles over everything at night. Outside is the most relaxing place to be after a long day.

Bolton reminds me of the night. It's so easy to relax when you're with him. No matter what's happened to you during the day, he can make it disappear. I think that's why he and Jesse got along so well. They were like day and night. Jesse was loud. He made every problem more evident. It's easier to see all of the problems in the light of day than it is in the dark of night.

I found myself wondering if things would've been different if I'd met Bolton first. Would we be together? Would he treat me the same way Jesse does? Or would I be with either of them? I decided not to dwell on the what ifs. Everything happens for a reason. Obviously, someone out there thinks I'm supposed to be with Jesse. 

Is this the way love's supposed to be? Filled with pain and doubt?

No, it's not.

Does Jesse love me the way he should?

No, he didn't.

Was I going to do anything about it?

Probably not.

I'd been too lost in thought to realize that we were standing in front of my house. I looked at Bolton, only to see that he was already looking at me. "What are you thinking about?" His voice was barely above a whisper. It'd be easy for his words to be lost in the night breeze. I only heard because we were standing so close.

I could feel my cheeks heating up. I turned my gaze to my shoes. "Nothing." I definitely couldn't tell him that I'd been wondering what it would be like to be his girlfriend.

"Something's bothering you, I know it is. Just tell me what's wrong." Everything is wrong, I thought to myself. You shouldn't be the one walking me home. You shouldn't be the one standing on my doorstep. You shouldn't be the one I want to kiss. But he was. There was no denying it.

I just shook my head. I didn't even want to know what he'd have to say if I told him the truth. I was hoping that he'd just leave it at that. I was hoping that he'd walk home without giving me a second glance.

Unfortunately, we don't always get what we hope for. Most of the time, we get the complete opposite. Fate has a funny way of doing things. That's the only way I could even begin to explain what happened next.

"I can't help you if you don't tell me what's bothering you." I still wouldn't look at him, so he tilted my head up. He gently grabbed my chin the same way he had in the restaurant. And I could feel the same emotins hitting me again.

We were completely alone, the only two people in the world. I finally realized what was different. It wasn't him. It was me. Tonight, I felt like I was someone else.

"I never realized how beautiful your eyes are. They look just like an emerald in the sunlight." This time, I didn't pull away. I just smiled. He moved his other hand to my waist, pulling me closer. "Of course, the most beautiful gems in the world can't even begin to compare to how beautiful you are when you're happy."

No one had ever said anything like that to me, not even Jesse. He never made me feel the same way Bolton did at that moment. I noticed him leaning toward me, and it felt like time stopped. I closed my eyes, waiting for the kiss that would change everything.