The Trail (MAJOR EDITING IN PROGRESS)

Nevermore (Alternate Ending)

Dead. That's all that's left to describe anything at this point. Wishes upon a star, dead. Lucy's dreams, dead. Even Lucy herself…

I knew that the trail had affected both of us in a big way, but I never realized quite how much, not for her at least.

Despite having to come here, it was nice that I got to meet her, one last time.

I look up as Toni slowly pushes open the sturdy door and walks into the office. Each footfall of his takes me farther and farther away from Lucy's world and into my own reality.

"You're a quick reader," He says with a sad and yet apologetic look in his eyes.

I glance at the clock and see that only a few hours have passed, "Yeah."

"Now, I know it's a sore subject, but I would like it if you could talk to me about the aftermath of your hike with Lucy."

I cringe slightly with my fingers, not really wanting to go into the details.

"After we got back to our normal lives, she took up nasty drinking habit and had to attend Alcoholic's Anonymous," Toni nodded and waited for me to go on.

An eerie silence overtook the room. One I hadn't heard since Lucy and Nancy had their little religion battle. I fold my hands up on the desk and cross by feet together, all while staring at Toni. He continues to stare right on back, with eyes that wish to pierce my soul and save me from my own ideals.

He clears his throat and becomes the weakest link, "Holland, I know that you know, that I know what Lucy went through. She did go to the AA meetings here."

"Your point?" I ask.

"You know my point."

"It was something I dealt with."

Toni leans forward in the chair and leans on his palms on the desk, "I won't make you tell me anything you don't want to, but I'd like you to talk to me."

I chuckle, "Is that so you can save me from eternal damnation?"

"No, it's so I can help you get out of what will be a lifetime of grief."

I look to him, and for the first time, see the bleeding wound from Lucy's death. His eyes hold bags underneath and he looks considerably thinner than when I first met him more than a year ago.

"After the trail, my parents insisted I go to see a therapist."

"And how did that work out?" Toni asked.

"I found a good one by the third try."

He cracks a smile, "Oh yeah?"

"The first one, an inexperienced woman straight out of college was way too nosy and would try to talk me into scheduling multiple appointments because she said I wasn't being open enough and needed more help."

I look to Toni and wait for his nod of interest to continue.

"The second was this guy who did nothing but act like some prick. He agreed to everything I said and then contradicted on what he had just agreed on. Nothing I told him ever stuck and he often asked me how I felt while I was severely injured."

I take a breath and a moment to correct my thoughts.

"The last one was a small mouse of a woman who quietly listened and interjected as needed. She also had insights into what the two of us saw."

"That's it?" Toni asked.

"Yes."

"You described everything wrong with the first two in an overly worded way, and then hardly say anything positive about the therapist you did like."