Entry One,
She was so beautiful, my mother. Call me insane but she's all I ever wanted to be. Strong, driven and smart. Not school smart or anything like that but smart enough to be realistic, practical... Real. Street smart. Maybe sleeping with any guy who'd toss a hundred at her didn't seem like an intelligent decision to the untrained eye but they just didn't know.... She did it all for me..... Everything she ever did was for me and I'd always love her for it........ Thanks mama, this one is for you.
September 20, 2008
"Mama, I wanna be in picture too!"
"Why you got that crown on, drew?" She asked with a hint of laughter within her voice.
"Daddy say imma princess."
"No you not."
I frowned, I didn't know if she was serious or not but I wanted her to believe that I was a princess.
"Princess?"
"Okay, your a princess... Your mama's lil princess."
"Yayyyyy, let's do a picture now ma.... I wanna bein it witchu, pleaaaaase?"
She chuckled, before looking my way and rolling her eyes a bit. "Why lil girl?"
"Cuz I wanna be like you when I go up!" I emphasized.
"Nawl baby." Her smiled decreased. "Mama ain't workin' this hard to bring you up so that you could be me, you gotta be better."
"Betta?" I repeated.
"Yeah." She nodded. "Way better than me, ya hear?"
I nodded as if I knew what she was talking about. "Picture mama..."
"I'm bout ta tear into Andrew's ass fa given' you that shit." She glanced up at the glistening plastic crown perched on my head. "That was suppose to be yo birthday crown."
"So?" I stuck my tongue out at her causing her to look over at me, glaring at me while she playfully pouted her lips just to add affect.
I was just so involved in her presence that I didn't even notice how fast she snapped the picture until I heard the shutter.
That moment was one of few where I actually felt like I had a mother. Those were good times, times that's I couldn't help but miss.
Six years have passed by as if the wind and I was nine now. Some woman came to my grandma's house asking for my mama in a rather rude fashion.
I knew that trouble wasn't far behind once the lady recognized my father not to far off, sitting on the couch asking him about why he never came around to see her no more.
Mama never took kindly to people disrespecting grandma's house like that. Especially when women claimed my daddy as their's.
That happened a lot.
I watched as my mama angrily pulled on her beat up all star converse mumbling some foul things under her breath.
It was embarrassing enough how that lady came up to our door but I was in for a world of ridicule when I knew my mom was about to walk out there in nothing but cuchi cutter booty shorts and a tank top..
She didn't care.
"Mama, keep drew in the house." My mom shouted to grandma.
"Patricia, what have I told you about fighting these low down hood rats." My grandma yelled.
