I Choose You

You Don't Know Me

Unedited

***

"And I can hardly speak,

My heart is beating so.
And anyone can tell
You think you know me well.
Well, you don't know me.
(no you don't know me)
No you don't know the one
Who dreams of you at night;
And longs to kiss your lips
And longs to hold you tight
Oh I'm just a friend.
That's all I've ever been.
Cause you don't know me."

- "You Don't Know Me" by Ray Charles

***

There was no holding back my laughter at Alexander for the fact that he was actually suggesting that I sneak out. I would never do that. I always feared that one of my parents would come into my room, at some point while I'm gone and notice my absence. I could not even imagine the wrath that would be placed on me if that was to happen. "You're so funny," I told him as we turned on my mother's block.

Alexander chuckled as he reached into his back pocket and pulled out his pint bottle. "Thank you. Beware, though, I got jokes for days," he stated before taking another large swig of the liquor. "It's freezing out here. How much farther to your house?"

I stopped and pointed to the home that was in front of us. "Actually, we're here . . . I know you want company tonight but it's really late. Are you sure that you just don't wanna go straight home and pass out? You seem tired and drunk."

Alexander looked at me, capturing me with his grey eyes. "Naw, I'm good," Alexander nodded at the house. "Hurry up. My balls will get frostbite if I stay out here any longer."

I giggled, "Wow. Don't sugar coat anything. Say it all."

"Don't know what gave you the impression I was going to 'sugar coat' things."

Right. I thought, remembering that I should not have expected such from him.

"Grace, it's not getting any warmer out here."

I blinked, "Uhh, right. I'll try to hurry." I rushed to the front porch; not wasting any time, I opened the door and stepped inside. Once I was fully inside, with the front door locked and closed, I hastily took off my heavy coat and placed it on the coat rack.

Before I could even start in the direction of the room my mother designated for me, she walked into the entrance hall. Hands placed firmly on her hip.

"I thought I heard the front door. Walker said you had gone on a walk," Mother gave me a stern look. "It's late. You did not tell me and you did not take your phone. You know better, Grace."

"Sorry," I apologized.

My mother allowed her stern expression to linger on her facial features but her arms fell to her side. "Just don't do it again. Now, I'm headed to bed. Do you need anything?"

I shook my head, "Uhh, no - wait, actually, I was going to head over to Maggy's. She - uhhh - she wanted me to come over."

My mother looked over at a grandfather clock that was placed in the middle of the entrance hall. After studying the hands for a second, Mother looked back at me with skepticism. "At eleven thirty, in the night?"

"Ummm, yeah. Dad lets me do it all the time," I tried to justify, knowing that Dad had allowed me to go to Maggy's at odd hours but never quite as late as I had been asking my mother at the time.

I bit my bottom lip, lying was not something I liked doing at all. In fact, as a reaction to my lies, I could feel my stomach doing nervous flips as a nauseous feeling cascaded over me.