Ø A clean house is a sign of a broken computer.
Ø Apple was going to make a smaller version of the iPod Touch for kids, until they realized that iTouch kids wouldn’t be an appropriate name.
Ø Before you criticize someone you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you’re a mile away, and you have their shoes.
Ø STRANGERS think I’m quite
MY FRIENDS think I’m out going
MY BESTFRIENDS know I’m completely insane
Ø I’m not single I’m in a long distance relationship, because my boyfriend/girlfriend lives in the future.
Ø I’d agree with you but then wed both be wrong.
Ø When you feel that nobody loves you, nobody cares for you, everyone is ignoring you, and people are jealous of you, You should ask yourself… AM I TOO SEXY?
Ø Every girl wants a bad boy who will be good just for her… …and…
…Every boy wants a good girl that will be bad just for him.
Ø My mom thinks my friends are bad influences, but honestly, I’m usually the one coming up with the ideas.
Ø I may look calm but in my head I’ve killed you three times.
Ø The thing about smart people is they seem like crazy people to dumb people.
Ø FAIL: First Attempt In Learning
Ø Bee vomit… natures candy
Ø Procrastinators unite… tomorrow
Ø I like you and naps.
Ø Glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.
Ø Sprinkles are donut herpes. (Think about it)
Ø Worrying is like a rocking chair; it gives you something to do but doesn’t get you anywhere.
Ø I love finding money in my clothes. It’s like a gift to me… from me.
Ø Am I the only one who…
Wants to create a boomerang-app for the IPhone and watch how many idiots throw their cellphones away?
Ø I AM JEALOUS OF MY PARENTS, I will never have a son/daughter so awesome as they had!
Ø I don’t know what’s worse my boyfriend/girlfriend texting me this, “I want to break up with you.” Or, after one minute adding this, “Sorry wrong number.”
Ø What do I do when I see someone extremely gorgeous…? I stare, I smile, and when I get tired I out the mirror down.
Ø I have so much to do that I am going to bed.
Ø I don’t hate you I just hope your next period happens in a shark tank.
Ø WOMENS LOGIC: When you like a guy, do nothing about it and expect him to magically know and make the first move.
Ø OUR GENERATION LOGIC: you can mess with our social interactions, steal our money, make our health care and education systems ridiculously lame that we will do nothing. But don’t you dare… mess with the Internet.
Ø When people ask dumb questions, I feel obligated to give sarcastic answers.
Ø Oh, I’m sorry… did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
Ø A bus station is where a bus stops. A train is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a workstation…
Ø Don’t be sad because of people- they will all die.
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Funny Sayings
Randomthe title says it all, these are in fact funny sayings that I've heard and decided to write down. I hope you enjoy, and I really hope I can bring a smile to your face.
