Suffocating
Silently
Drowning
In anxiety
Excruciating
Pain throughout
Numb
To the bone
Useless
In every way
Unable to move
Unable to talk
Unable to connect
Always able to think
Make it stop
Make me connect
Make me talk
Make me move
I beg you
I dream of heroism
I dream of adventure
Dreams never rise to the occasion
What's the point of dreams
If they never morph into reality?
I am setting myself up for failure
I can never meet my expectations
Make me stop dreaming
Make me face reality
Save me from my dream world
My fantasies are causing torment
I have created my own prison
My own coma
I need to wake up
I need to do something
I need to help someone
Even if no one wants my help
I need my help
My desperate need for answers
I'm afraid I have none
My desperate need to escape fear
I'm afraid I can't
My desperate need for perfection
I'm afraid there is none
My desperate need to be the hero
I'm afraid I can't
I've accepted it
So why can't I escape it?
I want to wake up
But I'm so tired
I want to break free of my cocoon
But I'm so weak
I want to do something
But I'm so self-involved
I want the light
But the dark is so welcoming
Is temptation too strong?
Or am I too weak?
Am I happy the way I am?
Or is this dream
A nightmare in sheep's clothing
Telling me to be happy?
The mind bends and flexes reality
So why not my state of mind?
Should I be told I am happy
And believe it
Or
Suffocate knowingly
Better to die unexpectedly
Sleeping
Rather than
Wide awake
Counting down the minutes
Ignorance is not my bliss
I won't make it so
